EVIL GENIE

[NorthernChaosGod]

smurf it, we're starting again.

I wish I had a 1971 Plymouth HemiCuda in mint conditon and nothing happened to affect my ability to drive.

[Imperfectionist]

Fine. You walk out your house to get to your car and a piano drops out of the sky and, oh no, right onto it.

I wish I had all the time in the world!

[Vermachtnis]

Granted, you have time stoppy powers. But you can't control it happens randomly and when you touch stuff during time suspension it causes a lot of friction and it will burst into flame.

I wish I had a maid.

[Greatermaximus]

Granted. You have a minute maid. It'll cost you an arm and a leg to afford her because she charges cleaning by the minute. It is costly.

I wish you had a heart.

[MJN SEIFER]

I wish you had a heart.

Granted. He has your heart, which of course means you die.

I wish to be surrounded by attractive girls who are attractied to me

(Shallow? Pretty much, I'm intrigued to see how this one's "corrupted"...)

[Bunny]

Wish granted. You are no surrounded by attractive girls, all of which are attractive to you. Unfortunately, the wish also changed what you found attractive and all of the women weigh several hundred pounds and hide chicken wings between their rolls of fat.

I wish I had a super power.

[themagicroundabout]

Granted. Your super power is that your skin is covered in a strange glow-in-the-dark bullet-proof goop, which carries with it the perpetual aroma of dog vomit. Your hair is also covered in this goop which imbues your locks with a Rapunzel-esque strength, enabling you to use your hair as a kind of goopy rope, etc. This means, of course, that your hair will be impossible to cut with any human technology and so may become quite unmanageable after a while.

I wish I could play the trumpet like Dizzy Gillespie.

[Hollycat]

granted, but it turns out he plays silent and uses recordings. your first gig is opening for the dixie chicks

i wish this psp was easier to post with