I Wanna Move To America & Need A Sponsor (I'll Do Anything)

[Cuchulainn]

My uses are

1. I'm not bad to look at despite being old.

2. I know how to operate a pen.

3. I know how to open a drawer, and shut it again with little to no help.

4. I have two eyes in the centre of my face, not on the sides like what birds have. It's ideal for hunting.

5. My tattoos glow in the dark.

6. I'm easy to please, pay me in beer, BBQ food & access Football matches (Soccer to you colonials).

7. I can run fast in slippers.

8. I can find the end of a new cellotape ream in under 5 minutes.

9. I may inadvertantly increase the workrate of others if you place me there due to my animal magnatism they will all be out to impress me.

10. Although I'm not gay I'm willing to do certain things with a certain amount iof alcohol to get a Green Card.

There you have it. I'm well worth the risks of employment & sponsorship I think you'll agree.

Applications Below.

Ya Wee Feckers

[Yar]

You can live with me. You just have to beat up anyone that's mean to me.

[Meat Puppet]

hah I tried this once and got in a lot of legal trouble so be careful

[Quindiana Jones]

I'm pretty sure America has railways now, Cuch. They don't need the Irish anymore.

[Cuchulainn]

I'm pretty sure America has railways now, Cuch. They don't need the Irish anymore.

THEY STILL HAVE BARS!

You can live with me. You just have to beat up anyone that's mean to me.

You point em out and I'll sort em for you brother.

hah I tried this once and got in a lot of legal trouble so be careful

How? It was all well when I married a Yank but once I realised I couldn't live another day with her her without throwing myself off a bridge (loved her just couldnt live with her) but now...psh.

[Shlup]

Try Kentucky.

[Cuchulainn]

Try Kentucky.

Take it there some joke there i don't get.

[Shlup]

It's Kentucky. *shudder*

[Christmas]

I think you stand a better chance of getting a sponsor if you say something like:

Hi, I'm a girl and I have boobs.

I think just this line will do.

[Melissaur]

ME! Come live with me! Bring the beer, though.

[Cuchulainn]

It's Kentucky. *shudder*

I'd live in Kentucky, I don't care if I to start to adopt wearing a dirty tee under an open flannel shirt and a trucker hat, 's all good.

I think you stand a better chance of getting a sponsor if you say something like:

Hi, I'm a girl and I have boobs.

I think just this line will do.

Good point, so you're saying be a girl. I'll have a bash. That our I'll marry the first girl that will take me & get in through the back door (If she likes that sorta thing HAHA JK, too much prep work invloved).

ME! Come live with me! Bring the beer, though.

After the alcohol & drug fuelled shenannigans 2 weeks ago I'm staying away from that stuff.

[Mo-Nercy]

Screw soccer. Move to Australia and bring your Gaelic Football skills to Aussie rules footy.

[Melissaur]

He's right. Anyways why the heck would you want to be here? I'd give my left AND right nut to live in a different country.

[o_O]

Living in Australia, you'll have the opportunity to hang out with dubstep himself. Just sayin'...

[Melissaur]

OMFG! FACE! I <3 you! come to america, please.