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Thread: How To Get To Heaven When You Die

  1. #16
    purple Alive-Cat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by eternal essence View Post
    Hobbits are baptists? :/
    They double as Rabbis, too. I don't know if xfrodobagginsx knows this.

  2. #17
    Meat Puppet's Avatar
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    Chronic masturbators like me don’t go to heaven.

  3. #18
    Your very own Pikachu! Banned Peegee's Avatar
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    Grin

    ololololololol asl op ^_^_^_^_^ pika chu I choose me!

    I mean goo

    So like, how do I get into heaven olol if jesus doesn't choose me but it's god who decides lol so what does it matter what i do if god descides like lol so liek if god descies lol okay right so what's the point if i kill or pee or help kids if god desides lol pg you don't get to go cuz like i'm god and my asl > your omg gods asl is greater than mine waht do i do alol can jesus make my asl > god ?

  4. #19
    Score: 0 out of 2 Dignified Pauper's Avatar
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    If liars goto hell... and this guy is lying by saying there is a God... who sends him to hell?

    I'm so confused.

  5. #20

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    If liars goto hell... and this guy is lying by saying there is a God... who sends him to hell?
    Assuming there is a hell and there is no God and by lying one sends oneself to hell.. I guess he sends himself there?

    idk religion is bonkers

  6. #21
    Nobody's Hero Cuchulainn's Avatar
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    I looked into this, the best way to make sure you get into heaven when you die. After much soul searching, advise gathering & praying the surest way that I was able to find was this...

    (SPOILER)

    Hope it helps.

  7. #22
    she'll steal your heart Hollycat's Avatar
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    And behold, a third of the land, and a third of the seas, and a third of the sky and the stars in them dissapeared and became as night.
    And the house of the lord was gone, being left those who represented 666 alone on the earth.

    the third that disappeared were those who believed, those who remained were numbered by the devil, 666, or in other words:
    66 and two thirds that remained.


    And woe were the fallen, divided by lot in halves, cast into the burning sulfur for all eternity with the dragons remains.

    half of the 666 were dropped into the fire, half were sent to judgement, and of that half, a third were consumed by hell, a second 666.


    Any who take away from these words will be taken away their share of the tree of life, and any who add to it, will have the great plauges added to him.

    There will be another satan, among those who pass the judgement, and he will be cast off into the darkness, and one will add his name to that of the angels and will be added to the wasteland, a new earth. their judgment is upon their own heads.



    Ask no questions, and I'll tell no lies

    I support this thread
    This post brought to you by the power of boobs. Dear lord them boobs. Amen

  8. #23
    Your very own Pikachu! Banned Peegee's Avatar
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    Grin

    STUPID EOFF CENSORSHIP

    HONG KONG SONG
    LOL AND SING ALONG
    JUMP AROUND AND HIT A GONG
    RUN AROUND ALL DAY LONG
    ASIANS LIKE TO PLAY PING PONG

  9. #24
    ...you hot, salty nut! Recognized Member fire_of_avalon's Avatar
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    Words of wisdom from PG.

    Signature by rubah. I think.

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