Hey man my title is in Japanese I can't help it.

It was supposed to be with ”の帽子”　but something happened so now I am an inanimate Pikachu that should not exist 残念ですね what the smurf I need add Chinese IME to this laptop so I can spam in Chinese too.

There is this cute girl named Choco Blanka that plays Street Fighter my Japanese is bad but I am trying to win her help please help me! She is already in a relationship with Momochi but I feel I can go Sako on his ass I think I confused everybody by now.

Here is a story:

むかし、　あのピカチュウはサトシを食べたが、　進化しなかった。　しかし、　サトシはピカチュウのお腹の中からピカチュウを殺した。　でもさ、　サトシは誤って自分も殺した。　本当は、　そんなことはありません でした。

つまり、　みんなポケモンゲットだぜ！

Also to keep this thread on topic:

Is it okay to attention whore in poorly written Japanese thanks!