Booze

[Meat Puppet]

On my 21st birthday I vomited on the ceiling.

you and he should chat.

omg noob what are you doing now we're gonna wipe

vote to kick peegee

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[Peegee]

Every time I get vote kicked, I wish I could do this

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[Old Manus]

A number of years ago, I was in Germany with a bunch of engineering guys in one of my college classes (on the EU's dollar, the only good thing they've done), to 'work with' some students from a technical college on a 'joint project'. It was essentially a two-week long bender. We drank so much German lager and weissbeer (so, so good), by the time I returned to sunny blighty I'd lost weight, lost my voice, and caught the flu due to the unholy union of sheer alcohol consumption and terrible german food.

But the part of the lager-haze that I will remember the most happened on the last night. We'd been at some fancy restaurant sampling the fine red wines, around a bottle each, then retired to the pub for one or two goodbye Hefe Paulaners. After our 7th, the place was shutting soon, so all but my roommate and a foolhardy lecturer returned to our hotel rooms, ready to be up at 7am to get to the airport.

Upon arriving back and realising that my roommate had the key to the room and was still at the pub, I decided to kip in my clothes on the spare bed next door. Glorious sleep followed, oblivious to the literal gutwrenching alcoholic tempest that was to occur around the hotel when my roommate returned. I was awoken at almost 6:30am by the sound of the door opening, revealing one of the lads wearing what can only be described as the thousand yard stare upon his dishivelled face. He mumbled something about having to stay up all night, and motioned for me to take a look in my room next door.

Upon pushing the slightly ajar door open, I was greeted with this lying in the doorway:

(SPOILER)

Now, this photo does not do the situation the slightest bit of justice. I could have taken photos of the blood-red vomit that covered the walls, the door, and the window. I could have taken photos of the lecturer lying in the corner, unconscious and holding a bucket in a warm embrace. But those were my smurfing sheets and suitcase that he'd puked all over, so thought-provoking photography was not of importance.

It turned out that they had come home later on in a drunken stupor and decided to have a game of last man standing with bottles of 40% abv strawberry schnapps. In the mess that followed, my roommate (pictured) had thrown up in every stall in the public bathroom (we didn't have en suites) and got vomit over many of their doors, busted into a room down the corridor containing a few Malaysian students and pissed out their window, went back to our room, threw up all over the walls and floor, got into my bed, passed out and fell off the bed into his own vomit.

Just as I had finished taking this all in, the alarm on the phone in his pocket started to ring (Dancing in the Moonlight by Toploader, a song I can never listen to again). After around 30 seconds of noise, he started to stir, and rolled straight into the sick. Not noticing this, he pulled out his phone, and thinking it was a phonecall, tried to answer it with a series of grunts. Still not remotely aware of any of the bile all over the room and himself, or even the fact that I was stood two feet in front of him, he hauled himself to his feet and stumbled out the door, falling into the doorframe and covering it in vomit in the process. I decided to leave him go and started getting all my stuff together.

Five minutes later I decided to go and find out where the hell he had disappeared to. It didn't take long before I found him standing bollock naked in the shower room, under a shower head which hadn't been turned on, still totally unaware of where he was. We had less than 20 minutes before we had to leave the country.

After stopping him from putting his vomit-covered clothes back on when he returned, getting all his junk in the van and us all getting the hell out of there (we left just as the cleaner was walking down the corridor), we faced a new problem at the airport, which was how on earth do we get a man who is absolutely blitzed drunk through passport control and security? We managed by both talking his every move into him and telling anybody who asked that he was retarded.

When finally arriving back in darkest south wales at 5pm, he was still wasted, and the last I heard he was hungover for the next one and a half weeks. Best morning of my life.

tl;dr: My friend got very drunk

[Shiny]

Never been drunk, but I have tons of stories of other people being drunk around me. One even including my grandmother. She some how thought I was her tax collector. Alcohol is a helluva a thing.

[Manny]

For my last birthday party, I had a Rocky Horror Picture Show dress up theme. This means that girls as well as the boys were wearing women's lingerie. Fishnets and all. Awesome. Made more awesome by the fact that we all got trashed and there are pictures in evidence.

Made more awesome by the fact that my ex-boyfriend's brother passed out in the middle of the floor and while I was trying to nurse him back to health, by ex-boyfriend got a can of something flammable (can't remember what it was--my drunk memory isn't that good) and proceeded to torch his brother's ass (which was covered by nothing more than nylon stockings) with it while the poor man was passed out in the middle of the floor, minutes away from puking his smurfing spleen out for the rest of the night. There are pictures. However, they are not in my possession. That is most unfortunate, because I would very much like to share them with you.

Conclusion: best drunk night ever.

[Meat Puppet]

Every time I get vote kicked, I wish I could do this

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I think it might be possible if the game considers you idle and then the first button you press after the vote is called is F1. Only one way to find out...

[Peegee]

Every time I get vote kicked, I wish I could do this

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I think it might be possible if the game considers you idle and then the first button you press after the vote is called is F1. Only one way to find out...

The only way I can do that is by going idle just before somebody votekicks me ><

[Iceglow]

I have never once been drunk in all of my 24 years of living. I've had one drink, and that's it. I had an uncle who was an alcoholic, so I have always known not to go lift a few with the buddies.

Whilst I understand and commisserate with you about the alchoholic uncle I will say drink in itself is not the issue. The issue with drinking is your own resolve and control. Don't tar yourself with the same brush as your uncle. Just because your uncle had trouble with the stuff doesn't mean you would. Ofcourse if you don't drink because you don't particulary like the stuff because of taste ect then thats fine.

This one time I got drunk, I kissed my cousin. It's embarrassing then, and now I don't even think about it because it's pretty stupid. Something a drunk would probably end up doing, given the circumstances.

You redneck azn dirty dawg you, was she hot? Would you have done more if you were more blitzed? We want to know it all.

As for me, there is a story it is a tale of one legendary night where life not only got strange, funky and a little bit homoerotic but to this day can be relied upon to inevitably cause me and Psychotic (who was present at the time) to dissolve in to hysterical fits of giggles until we can't breathe anymore at the mere mention of a word, the word in question is...Jackass Unfortunately the events aren't likely to be allowed here but if you ever ask us about it on xbl or msn or something away from here it could be retold one more time.

[NorthernChaosGod]

You could just PM me the story.

[Bunny]

Why wouldn't they be allowed here? Just get on with it and avoid going into excruciating detail about how Psychotic penetrated you in a deep and sexually fantastic way.

[Shoeberto]

I drunkenly serenaded my mom on Rock Band once.

I had a very bisexual night at a gay club another time.

Another time I made my friend my pantsless voodoo zombie and had him parade around the party.

One other time I pretended to have a different name and be cousins with my room mate's ex girlfriend and acted really protective of her at the party; ended up projectile vomiting out the side of a car, nearly passing out in my full bath tub, and having my roomie hate me for a month.

I kinda like omitting key details and letting people imagine the rest.

[rubah]

One other time I pretended to have a different name and be cousins with my room mate's ex girlfriend and acted really protective of her at the party; ended up projectile vomiting out the side of a car, nearly passing out in my full bath tub, and having my roomie hate me for a month.

I remember that xDD

[sharkythesharkdogg]

The first time I got drunk I did the classic thing everyone does, and dry heave for about 3 hours. I think I was 15. My friends and I took over a treehouse in my friends backyard. I lost everything. I thew up down the rope ladder that we'd later have to use to climb down. This made one of my friends pissed and he decided to jump out instead. Only he just sort of rolled backwards and fell out. He managed to fall 30 feet with out breaking anything somehow. Then promptly vomited. It got down to below freezing that night (suck!). My friend slept on the ground in his vomit. His hair was dyed red. So in the morning it was sort of frozen in an afro, and he looked like Ronald McDonald.

Another time a friend of mine was doing some Karaoke for us, using a dog brush as a microphone. We'd tell him his hair was messed up, and he'd use the brush to come it.

I decided one time to sleep outside and use my friends picnic table as a bed. I knew I was going to vomit, so in my drunken logic I pulled his grill over and used it as a pillow. That way I could vomit through the grates and wouldn't sleep in it. See? I'm a drunk McGuyver.

There's the time I wondered off and got lost. So I decided to fall asleep in the middle of a back country road. I figured some one driving along would see me, and I could hitch a ride. Some one did see me. I woke up to a bright search light and a county sheriff. I was 18.

The guy gave me a ride back to the house, dropped me off, and said "Just tell everyone to behave. I was a teenager too." Thank you Officer Hernandez. You were freaking awesome!

I'm sure there's more. You get the idea. It's always amusing.

[Jiro]

I'll participate for Timekeeper as well. Let me set the scene. You guys should know of Kings/King's Cup/That Drinking Game. Everybody knows it.

So that game. A saucepan was the cup. Seated on a pile of felled logs. Full of a little bit of everything we had: beer, bourban, vodka, some Sambucca up in there for a kick, and more but I don't remember. And of course, Timekeeper himself, wearing a pixie hat.

(SPOILER)

[Hot Shot]

I don't remember many time I've been drunk, at least not in depth. I remember one time me and my buddies went to south London to pick up some of the green stuff from a mate of mine. Seeing as we live in North London, we couldn't wait to have some of it so we bought a bunch of drinks and went to a local park to smoke it. We eventually lost track of time and got locked in the park, so we tried to look for a way out. Unfortunately, all the gate were locked and we weren't in the right state to climb a seven foot gate. I suggested we stay in the park until it unlocks in the morning. Little did I know that it would become extremely cold at night (it was summer, who'd have thought it) and time was going really slowly so we had to huddle together for warmth. One of my buddies fell asleep standing up and stated to freak us out because we would shout his name and he wouldn't reply.

After many hours, I grew impatient and desperate. I tried to squeeze under one of the gates (not a great idea, I almost got stuck) so we circled the perimeter of the park and decided to climb the easiest gate. I got over first and then my other buddy did, but the one who fell asleep standing up let go of the gate whilst climbing so we had to grab him so he wouldn't break his neck or crack his skull open.

So on our way back, I realised that the park was about to open in an houur or so and i was pissed off that we spent most of the night in the park and climbed over just before it opened when we could have easily climbed over it hours before hand. When we got back to North London, we headed to our favourite 24hr bagle shop and got some food (we had sever munchies) and headed home.