Antichrist - Watch it and never want to have sex again.
Okay, before I get into this, this movie is really really graphic, so read this thread at your own risk! Also I'm telling you the whole plot, so spoilers.
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Still here? Good! Okay this movie is called Antichrist and it has nothing to do with the title. See some producer leaked the twist at the end (Satan made the earth not God omg!!!) so everyone was like "well smurf it let's just re-write the whole script" and I don't even know what it's about now.
The movie centers around an unnamed couple. We begin with them having sex in slow motion all over the house to some classical music, when their two-year-old walks up to a window, climbs out of it, and falls to his death while the woman is having an orgasm. Obviously the couple is very upset over the death of their son. The woman grieves by having lots and lots of sex with her husband whether he wants to or not. The man is like "you are crazy woman" and they decide to go to a place called Eden and stay in this lonely little cabin where his wife once went to write her thesis on woman killing. Dun dun duuunnnn. Also on the way they see a deer with a stillborn baby dear just hanging out of its vagina. When they get to the cabin the woman freaks out. I dunno, something about the place just scares her. She stays inside the cabin and forces her husband to have lots and lots and lots of sex all the time.
Weird stuff goes on like lots and lots of acorns raining on the cabin, lots of ticks all over the place, and then something actually weird like a fox eating it's own intestines, then looking at the man to say CHAOS REIGNS. It's freaky, look it up on youtube or something because it's too gross for me to post it here. Later the guy goes looking through the cabin and finds his wife's gynocide thesis papers, and it gets crazier and crazier as she writes, going from "hey witch hunts aren't cool guys" to WOMEN ARE BAD WOMEN ARE BAD. He's like "wtf is this woman" to which she responds with having sex with him and asking him to beat theout of her while they do it. He refuses to hit her, so she runs outside, plops down in front of a giant tree, and masturbates. The man is like "well okay since you're gonna go masturbate under a tree" and has sex with her again, slapping her a little. Lots and lots of hands pop out of the tree and sort of chill there watching them have violent sex.
This is where it starts getting all eererghghghgh. I'll give you more spaces.
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Okay still here? Later on he finds out that their kid's autopsy report says "huh this kid has deformed feet that's kinda weird. Nothing to do with how he died though" and looks through all of their photos of him. Turns out the woman always put his shoes on the wrong foot. Again he's like "hey, uhhh, woman what's up with this" and she's like DON'T YOU EVER LEAVE ME, rapes him, and then crushes his balls with a huge, heavy, block of wood. You can't see them but you know his balls are paste now. Absolute paste. It's just awful. He passes out, because smurf, and she gives him a handjob until he ejaculates nothing but blood. She drills a hole through his leg and the block of wood so he won't be able to leave.
He wakes up and somehow drags himself into a hiding spot, because omg this woman is crazy, but this crow is like CAAAW CAAAW and she finds him. She's all crying like omg I'm sooooo sorry, and helps him hobble back to the cabin. She masturbates next to him for a minute, and then cuts off her clitoris. OH GOD. Then there's lots of hail and animals and it's implied to be witchcraft of some sort like what she had been researching for her thesis. The woman stabs her husband in the back with the bloody clitoris scissors and finally he decides that this bitch is crazy and needs to die now. He removes the block of wood bolted to his leg and strangles her and burns her body. He walks up a hill and dozens and dozens of blurry women start walking towards him.
THE END.
A video game adaptation was going to be made, but the company handling it went bankrupt so it got canceled. Too bad!
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Originally Posted by Shorty
what do I win?
