The most important decision you'll ever make.

[Cuchulainn]

Dude, the choice should be obvious. Think about it. A girl gorilla is gonna have pretty much the same parts as a girl human. Bam.

Ya see This...this is the mind of a practical, rational genius.

[fire_of_avalon]

You know what? Not thinking these animals are amazingly cool is now grounds for an instaban. This is ridiculous. I have never been more offended in my life. You two are clearly sociopaths. And not in the fun way like foa.

I have decided that I would like the elephant, because they are so smart and great. But I'm going to have to find another few elephants so it won't be lonesome. As much as a breeding pod of tiny dolphins would be awesome.

[Dignified Pauper]

This was by far one of the hardest questions I've ever been asked, without a doubt.

[Hollycat]

I choose a gorilla sized kitten

[NorthernChaosGod]

I'm surprised the gorilla is winning. You people realize that small monkeys exist, right?

But you can't reenact Donkey Kong games with them.

[Hollycat]

I'm surprised the gorilla is winning. You people realize that small monkeys exist, right?

But you can't reenact Donkey Kong games with them.

Best response ever

[Iceglow]

He's not tiny, he's just a paedophile. He loves little hairy girls.

So, what you're saying clearly is:

He's not tiny, he just loves you Dak because you're just like a "little hairy girl" You can thank me for the nightmares later.

This thread is a toughie, the reason being, a Giraffe the size of a Goat sounds awesome. I can't deny that. However there is one thing I'm thinking about which makes the Giraffe possibly the most dangerous of the bunch for a male person. When you go to the farm or the petting zoo take note of the height of the goats. Most goats apart from Pygmy Goats are roughly waist height. Now, waist height means when they "butt" you or ram you, their heads are at crotch height. Sounds painful? You betcha, I once saw a guy get rammed by a goat in the nuts, lets say he cried like a little girl, he cried more than a little girl, he cried like a bloke who had just been given a free sex change in to a little hairy girl. I'm surprised it wasn't Dak! Now some of you are probably thinking "Thats a Goat Steve, we're talking smurfing Giraffe's here, whats your point?" Well, here is my point, have you ever seen a Giraffe fight? This is Giraffes fighting. Now, picture this, if you will...The Giraffe swings it's head like a bony, horned club right in to your body, at testicle height. Yeah you winced at the thought of that, I did too when I thought of it.

Edit: Reasons for choosing 2 goldfish sized dolphins....

I remember growing up playing Ecco the Dolphin on my Megadrive. Oh yes. Now picture the first level of Ecco On the Tides of Time, picture it as a large tropical fish tank except it's got a small pod of minature dolphins playing in it. Oh yes, Ecco is real ladies and gentlemen!

[Shlup]

I'm surprised the gorilla is winning. You people realize that small monkeys exist, right?

But you can't reenact Donkey Kong games with them.

I accept this rationale.

[Rase]

Dolphins, easily. Love the damn things.

[Shattered Dreamer]

Pot belly pig sized elephant would be beyond awesome! That is all!

[Laddy]

Dolphins are cute in any size.

[NorthernChaosGod]

I wonder how strong the tiny gorilla would be; I'd like it to fetch things for me.

[Hollycat]

Koko, go get me a soda and you can have a banana after dinner.

[Iceglow]

Koko, go get me a soda and you can have a banana after dinner.

Replace soda with beer and you might be on to something there. Also his name must be Kong. Otherwise there is no King Kong or Donkey Kong jokes to be had.

[LunarWeaver]

I want the gorilla. We could do fastball specials.