Who am I?

[Citizen Bleys]

I am (in this thread only) assuming the identity of someone you should all be familiar with. Whenever the hell I feel like it, I'll post hints. The difficulty of the hints will be inversely proportional to my level of frustration at your stupidity. I'll answer yes or no questions. First person to correctly guess my identity doesn't get bobbitized.

I'll edit this post as new hints are added.

1. I have led French soldiers to victory over the British
2. I suffered from epilepsy
3. I was once captured by pirates, and convinced them to increase my ransom by more than double

EDIT: And that should be enough to figure it out. To my knowledge, only one person in the history of the universe conforms to both clues 1 and 2.

[NorthernChaosGod]

William the Conquerer

[Jiro]

Wait the french won something?

[Timekeeper]

Napoleon?

[Madonna]

This guy posts here, right?

[Bunny]

Louis-Joseph de Montcalm-Gozon

[Citizen Bleys]

William the Conquerer

Nope

Wait the french won something?

The French have won lots of things, just not under their own leadership.

Napoleon?

Negative

This guy posts here, right?

No

Louis-Joseph de Montcalm-Gozon

Who the Christ is that? No.

2. I suffered from epilepsy

[TrollHunter]

Jesus?

[Hollycat]

Don't be stupid. It is obviously Justin Beiber

[Madame Adequate]

Well, there is a theory that J'eanne D'arc was epileptic, but I don't think that has achieved a consensus among historians. Other than her I can't think of anyone who fits the bill. Maybe one of the dudes who beat Kyriell at Formigny? Can't remember who they both were, Arthur III of Brittany and someone else.

[Hollycat]

somebody from the american revolution?

[NorthernChaosGod]

I also heard Joan of Arc may have been epileptic, other than that, this clue doesn't help much.

[Madonna]

This guy posts here, right?

No

Are you sure?

[Jentleness]

I also heard Joan of Arc may have been epileptic, other than that, this clue doesn't help much.

I think you have earned yourself a point there, Julian! Am I right, Bleys? :hello:

[Citizen Bleys]

Jesus?

No. Jesus didn't command any French armies.

Don't be stupid. It is obviously Justin Beiber

I'm not familiar with Mr. Bieber's military record, but not even the French are so hard-up for leadership they'll follow a child.

Well, there is a theory that J'eanne D'arc was epileptic, but I don't think that has achieved a consensus among historians. Other than her I can't think of anyone who fits the bill. Maybe one of the dudes who beat Kyriell at Formigny? Can't remember who they both were, Arthur III of Brittany and someone else.

I'm not Jeanne D'arc, and I've never heard of the others you mentioned. Best guess so far, though.

somebody from the american revolution?

No. Good call on eliminating a lot of candidates with one shot, though.

I also heard Joan of Arc may have been epileptic, other than that, this clue doesn't help much.

I kind of thought it would. Guess not, though. The clues will start getting easy soon.

This guy posts here, right?

No

Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm pretty sure.

I also heard Joan of Arc may have been epileptic, other than that, this clue doesn't help much.

I think you have earned yourself a point there, Julian! Am I right, Bleys? :hello:

No, you're not.

3. I was once captured by pirates, and convinced them to increase my ransom by more than double