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Thread: The Battle Approaches

  1. #1
    Recognized Member G13's Avatar
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    Default The Battle Approaches

    Quote Originally Posted by The newspaper headline
    With the deaths of two major leaders, and the decimation of the Lionhearts, the remaining gangs have retreated to their hideouts to plan for the upcoming battle. This fight will determine the ultimate fate of EoFF. Who will stand victorious? Will the Misfits avenge their fallen leader and assume control? Will the Returners uphold their alliance with the Misfits now that they are weakened? Can the vicious Warriors truly be stopped? What are the mysteriously quiet Bandits up to?

    And will the Prime Minister's Secret Police be able to contain this increasingly violent street war? I'm sure all of EoFF agrees with this journalist when he says, I hope so.
    The recent massacre has shaken us all. The time to act is now! Returners and Misfits, Bandits and Warriors, the Police and this Snake character, all colors of blood will be shed!

    Fall back to our hideout, Warriors! We have some planning to do.

  2. #2
    Blood In The Water sharkythesharkdogg's Avatar
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    Can we plan AND make s'mores? uuhhhh....I mean sharpen knives.

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    Steve Steve Steve Steve Iceglow's Avatar
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    Huh? Flower?! What the hell?! Administrator Psychotic's Avatar
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    I was investigating a kidnap case. Marshall Banana. Got a tip. Had to break NCG's arm to get it. Went to Hypoallergenic Cactuar's apartment. I couldn't find her but I knew she was there.

    I found her underwear in the stove. Outside I saw two moombas gnawing on the bone of an arm.

    Took their heads. And I waited for Hypoallergenic Cactuar.

    He returned. Shock of impact ran along my arm. Jet of warmth spattered on chest, like hot faucet.

    Stood in firelight, sweltering. Bloodstain on chest like map of violent new continent. Felt cleansed. Felt dark planet turn under my feet and knew what cats know that makes them scream like babies in night. Looked at sky through smoke heavy with human fat and God was not there. The cold, suffocating dark goes on forever and we are alone. Live our lives, lacking anything better to do. Devise reason later. Born from oblivion; bear children, hell-bound as ourselves, go into oblivion. There is nothing else. Existence is random. Has no pattern save what we imagine after staring at it for too long. No meaning save what we choose to impose. This rudderless world is not shaped by vague metaphysical forces. It is not God who kills the children. Not fate that butchers them or destiny that feeds them to the moombas. It’s us. Only us. Streets stank of fire. The void breathed hard on my heart, turning its illusions to ice, shattering them. Was reborn then, free to scrawl own design on this morally blank world.

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    Night time in the Warriors hideout. All is quiet. Guardian XIII is away, tending to some dastardly business, and has taken a good majority of the gang with him. Of the six guards left behind, Remon, BoB, Shiny, Bert, and DMKA, only five are present when the raid begins.

    “I want them all rounded up!” a voice barks out as smoke grenades crash through the windows. A Warrior doesn't know the meaning of the word “prisoner”, though. As the Secret Police file in through the double doors of the warehouse, BoB and Shiny, who happened to be playing cards at that moment, sprung into action. Immediately, they throw the table up and, diving behind it, struggle to pull off the guns duct taped to the bottom of it.

    As they fumble with the tape, ShlupQuack appears from behind the upturned table and unloads a double barreled shotgun into them. Tossing aside the spent weapon, she spins around just in time to see Bert descend from the stairs, a nailbat hanging loosely in his hands. He sees her standing above the bodies of his fallen comrades and begins sprinting at her, swinging his weapon wildly and shouting all sorts of curses.

    Jentleness cuts him down before he can take five steps. Shlup walks over and prods the lifeless form of Bert with a foot. “Piece of trout.” she mutters. Then a loud crash from over by the door caught her attention.

    DMKA was wrestling fire_of_avalon and Caboose by the front entrance. He managed to get the drop on them and, picking them both up by the scruff of the neck, he slammed the two together, incapacitating them both. Then he faced ShlupQuack with a fire in his eyes.

    The two squared off. Shlup raised her hand and beckoned to the big Warrior menacingly. And then he charged.

    Shlup then pulled out her piece and put one right between his eyes, giggling delightedly at her deception.

    As the Secret Police filed out of the destroyed Warrior base, Remon stumbled out of the bathroom waving a match. “Whooee!” he shouted. “Don't go in there for at least twenty minutes! … Guys?”

  7. #7
    Very VIP person Tech Admin Rantz's Avatar
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    Dayum.

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    “Shlup, I need your Herby Hancock on these forms.” foa said as she entered the Secret Police chief's office. It was unnaturally dark, the lights were off for some reason, and there was a cool draft. “Shlup, are you alright? Why are the light of-” she asked as she turned the lights on.

    ShlupQuack sat motionless in her office chair, a ninja sword protruding from her chest. fire_of_avalon tried to scream, but her voice caught in her throat. Then some movement by the window caught her eye. A female assassin, garbed in Bandit yellows, turned to meet her eye, then jumped headlong through the open window.

    fire_of_avalon could barely contain her fear. She ran screaming from Shlup's office, “THE BANDITS HAVE KILLED OUT LEADER! SHLUP IS DEAD! THE BANDITS GOT HER!” So great was her fear that it never even dawned on her that there were no women gang members in the Bandits.

  9. #9
    Very VIP person Tech Admin Rantz's Avatar
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    Mercy! Things are getting interesting.

    Quote Originally Posted by Guardian XIII View Post
    So great was her fear that it never even dawned on her that there were no women gang members in the Bandits.
    There's something fishy about this...

  10. #10
    Microwaving canned bread TrollHunter's Avatar
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    oh, trouts going down~!
    Eyyyyyyyyyyyyy

  11. #11
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    “Remon, what can I do for you?” Guardian XIII asked as the Warriors newest member entered the room that served as his office. Ever since the raid the initiate had been distant and avoided eye contact with the leader.

    “Well, sir, I have a message for you.”

    “Lay it on me, brothe-”

    “The Bandits send their regards.” Remon spat as he stuck his belt knife into Guardian XIII's stomach. The leader of the Warriors crashed to the floor immediately. Infiltrated! he thought as the room spun in on him and his vision became dark. How could I have been so stupid!?

    As the last of the light faded from his eyes, he thought he could make out the blurry shape of Jiro smiling above him.

  12. #12
    Very VIP person Tech Admin Rantz's Avatar
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    Now this sounds more familiar. Come back home to us, Remon, you proper hero! Gwa ha ha ha!

  13. #13
    Microwaving canned bread TrollHunter's Avatar
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    Oh bollucks....
    Eyyyyyyyyyyyyy

  14. #14
    Forehead Remon's Avatar
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    Thank you Chief.



    You should have seen it coming. Who joins the warriors anyway?

  15. #15
    Microwaving canned bread TrollHunter's Avatar
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    I joined and that alone made it a very core reason to join/stay.
    Eyyyyyyyyyyyyy

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