One time after a night of drinking my roommate took my key and said 'okay mike you stay right here we'll be back' and took off to bring their car around. A few minutes later another friend saw me goofing around and too drunk for my own good and told me to come along with her in her taxicab.

So she drops me off at her place and not wanting to pay money for fare I got out of the cab and started to walk home.

here's a map



I had to cut through a hospital, a college, a baseball diamond, some wetlands, and then I'll be safe. Yay.

So off I trekked. I made it past the hospital with no issue but as I was making my way around the college some kids went up and asked me if I had any weed on me. I wasn't in the mood so I told them I didn't have anything. I then walked around and started climbing the fence in the baseball diamond.

That was when I realized those guys were following me.

ohshiohshiohshi what do I do? I KNOW I'll go to a coffee shop! It's a left turn instead of a right turn at the end of the red line, so I could easily make it. I walk into the wetlands and start walking. Right into a huge pool of water. We're talking waist deep. Yay. No hiding at a coffee shop for me. I jumped my backyard fence and that's when it hit me. I'll let you recount the events in the night. Here's a hint. Read the first sentence again.

How the hell was I supposed to go back in the house? I had walked home and my roommates were still not home yet. The front door was locked. I decided to stop worrying about gibberish and started to sleep on my deck.

Some time later i woke up. It was raining on me. This night was awesome. Grumbling, I grabbed my backyard door and flung it open.

FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

I had enough of this. My roommates later found me passed out on the living room floor in a puddle of bog and rain water. Yay classy.