Granted but the cookies you get are not the type of cookies you can eat. They're browser cookies and they contain a redirect for your browser to a child porn site instead of EoFF.
I wish I was a rich person who didn't have to work for a living and could spend my time focusing on the finer things in life.
Granted. You spend your time focusing on child porn.
I wish I wasn't drunk as hell right now.
Face
ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ส้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้
Granted, even better; your never gonna get drunk again.. and to make sure you wont you are now alcohol-intolarant.
Next time you drink, you will die
i wish the xmas tree would pack up itself
Granted; your Christmas Tree is possessed by an evil spirit and pack itself up, and then proceeds to wait in its box until you walk by so it can eat you.
I wish I didn't have to go back to school Wednesday.
granted, your going back to school theusday
i wish the repair of my laptop wasnt that expensive :/
Granted. The repair of your laptop is now MORE expensive.
I wish to become a biologically superior specimen of the human race.
Granted. You evolve into a perfect human, unlock the full capacities of your brain, and learn how to teleport. You fumble with the position because of a crosswind in the fourth dimension, and end up in Africa, scaring a local tribe. The tribe kills you because they've never seen an outsider before.
I wish it would rain bananas tomorrow.
Face
ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ส้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้
Granted it rains bananas tomorrow. This in turn causes the apes and gorillas at your local zoo to go insane. They break out and maul you to death because you're hoarding the bananas.
I wish I could live somewhere nice and warm with good neighbours.
Granted. You live there for one day and then get deported because of a glitch in the DPS computer system that makes them think you're an illegal immigrant from Julian-land. You get stuck in Nuevo Laredo. After standing in the street for less than five minutes thinking about what to do next, you get murdered.
I wish my girlfriend wasn't so physically demanding. >.<
Face
ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ส้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้
Granted. Your Girlfriend is now dead, and therefore not physically demanding at all.
I wish I knew how many licks it takes to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop.
Granted. You learn the answer to life, the universe, and everything. So you kill yourself under the burden of more knowledge than the brain can hold.
I wish I had more books.
Face
ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ส้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้
Granted. You obtain so many books you're crushed to death under their weight. Also, they're full of child porn.
I wish my phone didn't suck.
Eyyyyyyyyyyyyy
Granted. It blows.
I want to have a Mexican baby with my Asian girlfriend.
Face
ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ส้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้