Finale!



OH MY GOODNESS! THE WIRE!!!

We have to WIN CALIFORNIA FROM THE GODLESS LIBERALS!!!



There's not an alternative! If we can take California, we may not win, but we will have the moral victory!



Time to go back to our HQ back in Colorado! We're going to throw the biggest party of the campaign, and win or lose, we'll still be drinking the blood of Christ.



Oh, and this is a map of where we are well known...



And here are the national polls:



(I didn't realize that random electoral votes would dramatically mess things up... Some states had like 70, and some really populated ones were super low.... everything was randomized... whoops.)


As the results came in:



We knew we lost New England. We only went to New York once... We didn't go to any other state...



The next batch of states started setting the tone. Beatrice was clinging to her Bible and speaking in tongues.. We were all a little worried.

Then...



A shining beacon of hope in the South!!! We were going to win!



And a few more states go RED!



And two more! Beatrice, renewed with piss and vinegar, started praising Jesus' name!



TAKE THAT! MICHIGAN, HOME OF AUTO WORKERS, LOVES US!



Who knew you had to campaign in all these southern states to win them...?



Or those Midwestern states...



Oh, but we won Texas. Everything is bigger in Texas.

We're picking up votes!



Our presence in the West was much more pronounced...





We're still behind... no way to catch up... Beatrice Stone called President Brock Hussiny NoBama. We're crushed, some of us tear up.

We even lost Alaska...



The Final Map:



Then came the brutal part:



The public concession to America, to our campaign, to the world. This nation had abandoned God, and in doing so, damned itself to more spending, the killing of seniors, gay marriage and forced abortions!







-FIN-