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Thread: FF5 Revisited!

  1. #46
    navmaldeuh Madonna's Avatar
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    A whole new world, right before your eyes. All of the whole new world. Galuf needs help defending his island?

    I personally find daggers my go-to weapon when dispatching spouses; Unne's dad learned the hard way poison is the difficult method. Glad he sorted that out though.

  2. #47
    Not responsible for WWI Citizen Bleys's Avatar
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    OK, back to short updates Tuesday-Friday mornings.

    Chapter VII: Another World


    Yes, they do think that island is the whole planet

    Having failed to find Galuf, our heroes pitch a tent and settle in for the night. Continuing with the previous trend, Faris has a disturbing confession


    Good going as usual, Faris


    Of course Tzepish controls the police




    what kind of villain indeed


    Oh, for smurf's sake


    Now that is pure evil

    Galuf to the rescue!



    Well, that was an easy escape.

    Better still, we now proceed to the best goddamn music in any FF game, ever



    ...where we meet...wait, what?


    That is so racist

    Tzepish then sends us flying by setting off an explosion centred around his own castle because that's how villains roll. Being unkillable, we land on a different continent, unscathed, and head off in the only direction that we're able to go, to find...


    Yes. Yes it is.

    Well, surely the next shiny thing on the world map will allow us to advance the plot!


    Or it would if we could get at any of them


    Of course, Tzepish.

    No more shiny spots on the map accessible, I guess we'll just wander aimlessly forever. But hey wait, there's an area that you have to cross a specific square to reach. Surely that can't be plot-relevant, right?




    ...

    So we drop into a pit in order to chase down and eat a sentient being. Perfectly in character for us!



    Well, it worked! He led us straight to...


    An entire village of delicious, delicious moogles. IT'S EPIC MEAL TIME!



    w00t!

    Of course, it's not like we're going to keep our word and spare them...not when we're this hungry!



    But it seems Galuf's granddaughter has finally found us! A bit too late for the moogles, though.



    Would you believe Galuf owns a frikkin' castle?

    A whole frikkin' castle!

    Tomorrow: I'll Think Of A Chapter Title Later

  3. #48
    navmaldeuh Madonna's Avatar
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    Oh man, I could use a slow-roasted pulled Moogle sandwich...

  4. #49
    Eggstreme Wheelie Recognized Member Jiro's Avatar
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    Holocausting should be a word.

    They see me rolling. They hating, patrolling.
    Trying to catch me riding dirty.


  5. #50
    Not responsible for WWI Citizen Bleys's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jiro View Post
    Holocausting should be a word.
    Now it is. I'm going to make every attempt to use it in FFXI the next time someone asks me what I'm doing while I'm working on a trial.

  6. #51
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bleys
    Having failed to find Galuf, our heroes pitch a tent and settle in for the night.
    That's strange. Usually it's finding Galuf that causes me to pitch a tent.

  7. #52
    Not responsible for WWI Citizen Bleys's Avatar
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    I didn't know you were a cub!

  8. #53
    Feel the Bern Administrator Del Murder's Avatar
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    I look forward to reading this every afternoon.

    Proud to be the Unofficial Secret Illegal Enforcer of Eyes on Final Fantasy!
    When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine Trump University! - Ralph Wiggum

  9. #54
    Not responsible for WWI Citizen Bleys's Avatar
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    Chapter VIII: I'll Think Of A Chapter Title Later

    The quality of inhabitants of Galuf's castle is...unsurprising.



    I guess we'd better see how the Hiryuu is holding up after carrying six people across the length and breadth of the world


    Heh. Coccyx.


    Uh...didn't we already play this story arc at Carwen?

    This time there's a twist -- The Hiryuu is only going to live for ten minutes!



    Between the mountain with the magic plant and Castle Bal, we find a town that we can't go around, run by Ninja Wolf, an old friend of Galuf's. He challenges Unne to a duel, and attacks using one of Dorgann's techniques, which Unne recognizes.

    Unne cuts Ninja Wolf in half, and they catch up on old times. Ah, nostalgia. Flashbacks are so gr...wait, what?




    Now the people of Ninja Wolf's town come out of hiding. They are...unique.




    The mountain climb is boring, so we'll skip to finding the Hiryuu plant.



    God, our party is dumb

    About two minutes later...





    Yeah, you should.

    Well, we've got like 30 seconds left before the Hiryuu dies, best run on up to -- what's that, Lassie? Cara has cancer?




    We'll need a hiryuu to get there. OH BUGGER THERE'S LIKE 10 SECONDS LEFT!



    Uh...guys? She's dying while you talk about her giant wanger


    The plant worked! Hiryuu is cured!

    Tomorrow: Chapter IX: A Cure for Cancer

  10. #55
    Would sniff your fingers to be polite
    Nameleon.
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    Make more, Bleys. Stop working. Stop going outside. Just, please, make more.

  11. #56
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dialogue
    Her spine is bent, her wings are torn, and she contracted syphilis.
    I'm starting to be convinced that you wrote the dialogue, Bleys.

  12. #57
    Not responsible for WWI Citizen Bleys's Avatar
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    I would love to take credit for the dialogue, but alas, I'm not that funny.

  13. #58
    Do Myself a Mischief Vermachtnis's Avatar
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    That's a tail!? My entire life is built upon a lie.

  14. #59
    navmaldeuh Madonna's Avatar
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    Well, at least Krile had not contracted syphilis during the interim. That would have been awkward.

  15. #60
    Eggstreme Wheelie Recognized Member Jiro's Avatar
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    If only there were a convenient cure to cancer on the island to the northwest of here.

    They see me rolling. They hating, patrolling.
    Trying to catch me riding dirty.


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