Shorty's Round 1 Bob Loblaw Mog Blog Confession

[Shorty]

Juliebird is a sex-crazed metalhead, though. I am not.

[Psychotic]

now you're making it too easy.

in more ways than one, heyo!

[Shorty]

[Madame Adequate]

Moonflower Starchild you are quite legitimately the most horrendous creature that ever coalesced in the depths of a hippy's unwashed pair of boots. I am going to see to it that you live in a concrete cube for the rest of your life. There will be television screens that mostly display more concrete but occasionally they will show images of flowers and trees and fields. In your disgusting lust to shove stamens up your stigma you will approach it with hopeful wonder in your eyes, and reach out your hand but OH-! No. It will disappear before your very eyes and revert to showing a concrete wall.

Or maybe some industrial steel plating.

[Psychotic]

i like big butts and i cannot lie

[Shorty]

You're jealous of my spirit and that I'm one with the earth. I WILL NOT BE BROKEN

Instead I will see to it that you are placed in a sancuary with friendly wild animals and birds and a plethora of beautiful flowers and trees and little bees and butterflies buzzing around and they will all be your friends and talk to you and nature will be in your ear every moment of the day and you'll never have another thought to yourself because Mother Earth is going to invade your soul.

[Madame Adequate]

I will kill and eat all of it. And whatever is left I will use to build mining machines, and then I will dig up metal and rock and I will say "EARTH FIRST! We can pave the other planets later!"

[Freya]

Wild game is the tastiest....

[Shorty]

Nope. The dandelions and ivy will grow up and over everything at my command to cease your progression.

[Madame Adequate]

You think you're Poison Ivy but you're more like using poison on a final boss where it will be completely useless

Though that wasn't true in FF13 admittedly it was pretty damn useful there

made a nice change

anyway yeah get your waps out and I'll put in a good word for you regarding this competition

[Shorty]

I AM GAIA AND I WILL DESTROY YOU

with love and flowers

[Jiro]

Whoa what's with all the hate?

I was gonna say that like

I tried to crack onto Shorty but I wasn't staff any more so it failed

sadface forever

[Shorty]

That wasn't the reason you struck out, bro!

[DK]

Every time I read one of Sarah's posts this is the only thing that goes through my mind

[Shorty]

That is essentially what I'm doing.