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Thread: Raistlin's Round 2: Trapped

  1. #1
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Default Raistlin's Round 2: Trapped

    Day... I'm not sure what day it is anymore. The days bleed together now.

    I have been sentenced to this island for a seeming eternity now, though it could not have been more than a week or so. My task is to compete, and my competition can only be described as screaming monkeys. The people or things running this competition, collectively referred to as Shinra, are cruel taskmasters, keeping us going day and night. Over the past few days, they actually made us... talk to other people, and come up with new topics to keep the conversation going. My agony cannot be accurately described in mere words.

    Most recently, we have been divided into groups. I can only surmise that this is for the Shinra's entertainment, as they have given us menial tasks to complete. Or perhaps the Shinra would like each group to destroy themselves, which is a distinct possibility if I have to deal with the one called Manus for much longer. Although even he has had more to say than "Blackmage," who does nothing but sit in a corner crying about winning "their" respect next time, whoever "they" are. If it is the Shinra's respect he is after, it seems a futile hope.

    I am starving, as the Shinra demand we fend for ourselves out here in this forsaken wasteland. That hunger is not likely to be sated tonight, for it is the one called Bleys's turn to cook. I will not go into detail about such trivial things, but will say that I did not heretofore think it was possible to ruin tacos. Perhaps I will sneak over to the group with the women in order to steal some food.

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    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Round 2, Night 1

    I was sitting down with the meager food I had managed to scrounge when someone, apparently part of our group, charged through the bushes, drunkenly shouting "I am Sir Flambardaman Quinterimopolis!" -- or something similarly nonsensical -- "Be awed at my power!" And then he urinated on a squirrel.

    We were first instructed to come up with a team name, a seemingly innocuous and easy task, and everyone had many ideas. We tried to put the issue to a vote, but we made the mistake of giving the vote counting responsibilities to Vivi. Instead of just reading out the numbers, he insisted on yelling and insulting every vote that was cast until the voting process was in shambles. We tried mildly suggesting that a detailed reasoning was not really required to settle such a trivial matter, but he refused to listen.

    I am surrounded by fools.

  3. #3
    Feel the Bern Administrator Del Murder's Avatar
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    This reminds me of the survival journal I started when the staff banished me for our prank.

    Proud to be the Unofficial Secret Illegal Enforcer of Eyes on Final Fantasy!
    When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine Trump University! - Ralph Wiggum

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    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Great minds and all that.

    And I never knew about your survival journal. Did you post it on EoFF? It should go in the April Fools subforum.

  5. #5
    Eggstreme Wheelie Recognized Member Jiro's Avatar
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    This is good. Keep it up, good sir!

    They see me rolling. They hating, patrolling.
    Trying to catch me riding dirty.


  6. #6
    Feel the Bern Administrator Del Murder's Avatar
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    It was in Private Feedback. I'll put it in the Archive.

    Proud to be the Unofficial Secret Illegal Enforcer of Eyes on Final Fantasy!
    When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine Trump University! - Ralph Wiggum

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    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Round 2, Night 2

    Some of my hapless co-inmates are proving less utterly incompetent than my first impression suggested. I was highly dubious after this morning's events. We had been given the task to plan an event for an anniversary date this is apparently important to the Shinra. My unwanted cohorts immediately started babbling all sorts of nonsense about turtle races, synchronized swimming, and ponies, until I actually bothered to ask what was the anniversary of. Then Quin blushed and pulled the instructions out of an empty liquor bottle. Finally, we started planning our task appropriately.

    Two of them, Bleys and Vivi, are proving particularly useful. Every now and then Bleys still yells out "PIPE!" but his ideas are fanciful and appropriately ridiculous given the absurd task. He is a dreamer. I pity the poor bastard. Vivi has similar ideas but is more realistic and solid, though I am concerned every time anyone gives a simple response around him without a detailed reasoning. They say he has killed before.

    The drunken Quin was apparently picked to be our leader by the Shinra. Well, he was drunk last night. Today he has been mostly sitting by the fire holding his head and moaning "why oh why did I listen to the damn elephant?" Due to his occasional incapacity, he ordered us to select a deputy leader "in case I'm passed out in a gutter somewhere and the Shinra come a'calling for answers, bloody hell my head hurts." Two other members of the group immediately looked at me. The rest picked their noses. Damn.

    The rest of my group have neither advanced nor hindered our progress to any significant degree. They seem content with their lot, humming gleefully in the sun, blissful in their ignorance, unlike those of us who struggle against the ever-present chains of servitude. I glare at them, but mostly I envy them.

  8. #8
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    OOC:Del: I looked for your journal in the archives and I couldn't find it.

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    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    OOC:Taking a brief break from silly posts where I make fun of everyone


    I really like where our group is going. Our RP with FF knowledge/quiz elements is very creative and is coming along nicely. It only took a day or so of me hammering in that our event should have something to do with the FF series. It's really been Vivi, Bleys, and I driving the team, though Quin is active and has some suggestions, and shows a willingness to put forth some effort. Bleys and I particularly have always worked well together. I am actually somewhat eager to get started with story ideas, so I'd like for us to decide what world to set it in first. Maybe I'll just go ahead and write something up tomorrow anyway. This round is definitely proving highly entertaining.

    As for our other members, Rantz has been disappointingly inactive, but having been only recently one of the most productive admins of the past few years, as well as currently a Developer, I can't blame him. Manus cracks some jokes... so basically is exactly as productive as he is on the rest of EoFF. And blackmage_nuke hasn't done much, though I hope to recruit him for some FF story/quiz ideas.

    Smack talk: We're totally going to win this round. At the very least, we have the best name and slogan (assuming "At least we don't have Steve" becomes our slogan). In fact, I am so certain that B-cubed is going to win, that in the highly implausible situation of us losing, I am fully prepared to sacrifice Quin.

  10. #10
    Eggstreme Wheelie Recognized Member Jiro's Avatar
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    That slogan would actually win some points in your favour, I'd say!

    They see me rolling. They hating, patrolling.
    Trying to catch me riding dirty.


  11. #11
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Round 2, Night 4

    We have great plans.

    Sullen at our captivity, resentful of the demeaning labor, the group has put its hopes and dreams into our task. We may never get off this wretched island, we may be mere pawns of the Shinra, we may never even see our constant laboring come to any fruition, but we are determined to make our creation beautiful. Our plans sore as high as the heavens, so far up that we may never even pull them off effectively. We may indeed have bitten off more than we can chew, but we lack any real food to chew anyway. We dream, and in that dream we find solace for our weary souls.

    Most of my group has been surprisingly pleasant, at least once everyone became focused on the same idea. Even the quiet Blackmage spoke up with some advice, though half the time he appears to be discussing something from the day before. Perhaps his pilot to the island did not follow the correct bearing, and his consciousness is in the past. I have heard of such fantastic things happening on hidden islands.

    I do still have to keep telling Bleys that we are not including an army of pink bunny rabbits into our plans. If we even had such an army, we would surely use it against the dastardly Shinra. They may look harmless, but who could survive against all of those nasty, big, pointy teeth?

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    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Blogs are less fun this time around because there are less people commenting. Audience, you need to step it up!

    So the past few days I was out to the back of Mog Island with the other contestants and started digging. And digging. And digging.

    And digging.

    When suddenly, my shovel hits something! I pull it out and... what is this?

    (SPOILER)

    Is it... a genie statue? Should I ask for an orange head?

  13. #13
    Eggstreme Wheelie Recognized Member Jiro's Avatar
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    Congratulations on finding the idol! Though it'll surely be handy, I think you might cop a bit of flak for going to such lengths. I don't know, but anything to aid you in your quest is a good thing in my books.

    They see me rolling. They hating, patrolling.
    Trying to catch me riding dirty.


  14. #14
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    The idol doesn't actually do much of anything. I'm not going to take off a round when I use it, and if the staff wants someone gone, they'll be gone in the later rounds anyway. Unless during a later round a contestant completely changes the staff's minds, the only plausible effect is ensuring an extra round of work for someone who would otherwise be cut then (which is fine by me, as they're generally entertaining). I just wanted to see if I could find it.

  15. #15
    Eggstreme Wheelie Recognized Member Jiro's Avatar
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    Makes sense. Good work on tracking it down, anyway. I wanted to have a look around and sell it to someone who was desperate but I was too bloody lazy.

    They see me rolling. They hating, patrolling.
    Trying to catch me riding dirty.


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