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Thread: bad ideas of the day.

  1. #91

    Default Eating icecream from the assembly line... \/

    Jack: How do you know?

    Will: It's more of a feeling really.

    Jack: Well, that's not scientific. Feeling isn't knowing. Feeling is believing. If you believe it, you can't know because there's no knowing what you believe. Then again, no one should believe what they know either. Once you know anything that anything becomes unbelievable if only by virtue of the fact you now... know it. You know?

    Will: No.

    If Demolition Man were remade today

    Huxley: What's wrong? You broke contact.
    Spartan: Contact? I didn't even touch you.
    Huxley: Don't you want to make love?
    Spartan: Is that what you call this? Why don't we just do it the old-fashioned way?
    Huxley: NO!
    Spartan: Whoa! Okay, calm down.
    Huxley: Don't tell me to calm down!
    Spartan: What's gotten into you? 'Cause it sure as hell wasn't me.
    Huxley: Physical relations in the way of intercourse are no longer acceptable John Spartan.
    Spartan: What? Why the hell not?
    Huxley: It's the law, John. And for your information, the very idea that you suggested it makes me feel personally violated.
    Spartan: Wait a minute... violated? Huxley what the hell are you accusing me of here?
    Huxley: You need to leave, John.
    Spartan: But Huxley.
    Huxley: Get out!
    Moments later Spartan is arrested for "violating" Huxley.

    By the way, that's called satire. Get over it.

  2. #92
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Just ten more minutes....

  3. #93
    Banished Ace Recognized Member Agent Proto's Avatar
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    I can do this tomorrow.

    *following day*

    I can do this tomorrow.

    *following day*

    I can do this tomorrow.

    etc...

    Apparently, I have been declared banished.

  4. #94
    Recognized Member Shorty's Avatar
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    Just one donut. Maybe another.

  5. #95

    Default

    Nah, this joke isn't inappropriate.
    Jack: How do you know?

    Will: It's more of a feeling really.

    Jack: Well, that's not scientific. Feeling isn't knowing. Feeling is believing. If you believe it, you can't know because there's no knowing what you believe. Then again, no one should believe what they know either. Once you know anything that anything becomes unbelievable if only by virtue of the fact you now... know it. You know?

    Will: No.

    If Demolition Man were remade today

    Huxley: What's wrong? You broke contact.
    Spartan: Contact? I didn't even touch you.
    Huxley: Don't you want to make love?
    Spartan: Is that what you call this? Why don't we just do it the old-fashioned way?
    Huxley: NO!
    Spartan: Whoa! Okay, calm down.
    Huxley: Don't tell me to calm down!
    Spartan: What's gotten into you? 'Cause it sure as hell wasn't me.
    Huxley: Physical relations in the way of intercourse are no longer acceptable John Spartan.
    Spartan: What? Why the hell not?
    Huxley: It's the law, John. And for your information, the very idea that you suggested it makes me feel personally violated.
    Spartan: Wait a minute... violated? Huxley what the hell are you accusing me of here?
    Huxley: You need to leave, John.
    Spartan: But Huxley.
    Huxley: Get out!
    Moments later Spartan is arrested for "violating" Huxley.

    By the way, that's called satire. Get over it.

  6. #96
    YOU BOYS LIKE MEXICO?! Jowy's Avatar
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    Sealth Greenwood (Sargatanas)

    Default

    what'd the caterers bring?

  7. #97
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    Default

    "2 AM? No problem!"

    "Sure, I could handle some more work."

  8. #98

    Default

    Watching BloodRayne... right now. Though there was fairly decent sex scene at one point. Also the saving grace of the dragon movie Kristanna Loken was in as a Viking.
    Jack: How do you know?

    Will: It's more of a feeling really.

    Jack: Well, that's not scientific. Feeling isn't knowing. Feeling is believing. If you believe it, you can't know because there's no knowing what you believe. Then again, no one should believe what they know either. Once you know anything that anything becomes unbelievable if only by virtue of the fact you now... know it. You know?

    Will: No.

    If Demolition Man were remade today

    Huxley: What's wrong? You broke contact.
    Spartan: Contact? I didn't even touch you.
    Huxley: Don't you want to make love?
    Spartan: Is that what you call this? Why don't we just do it the old-fashioned way?
    Huxley: NO!
    Spartan: Whoa! Okay, calm down.
    Huxley: Don't tell me to calm down!
    Spartan: What's gotten into you? 'Cause it sure as hell wasn't me.
    Huxley: Physical relations in the way of intercourse are no longer acceptable John Spartan.
    Spartan: What? Why the hell not?
    Huxley: It's the law, John. And for your information, the very idea that you suggested it makes me feel personally violated.
    Spartan: Wait a minute... violated? Huxley what the hell are you accusing me of here?
    Huxley: You need to leave, John.
    Spartan: But Huxley.
    Huxley: Get out!
    Moments later Spartan is arrested for "violating" Huxley.

    By the way, that's called satire. Get over it.

  9. #99
    Jinx's Avatar
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    whole bag of flamin' hot cheetos in bean dip
    Quote Originally Posted by Fynn View Post
    Jinx you are absolutely smurfing insane. Never change.

  10. #100
    bless this mess Clo's Avatar
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    Default

    I'll feed that stray cat!


  11. #101

    Default

    I don't need to wash my hands just now.
    Jack: How do you know?

    Will: It's more of a feeling really.

    Jack: Well, that's not scientific. Feeling isn't knowing. Feeling is believing. If you believe it, you can't know because there's no knowing what you believe. Then again, no one should believe what they know either. Once you know anything that anything becomes unbelievable if only by virtue of the fact you now... know it. You know?

    Will: No.

    If Demolition Man were remade today

    Huxley: What's wrong? You broke contact.
    Spartan: Contact? I didn't even touch you.
    Huxley: Don't you want to make love?
    Spartan: Is that what you call this? Why don't we just do it the old-fashioned way?
    Huxley: NO!
    Spartan: Whoa! Okay, calm down.
    Huxley: Don't tell me to calm down!
    Spartan: What's gotten into you? 'Cause it sure as hell wasn't me.
    Huxley: Physical relations in the way of intercourse are no longer acceptable John Spartan.
    Spartan: What? Why the hell not?
    Huxley: It's the law, John. And for your information, the very idea that you suggested it makes me feel personally violated.
    Spartan: Wait a minute... violated? Huxley what the hell are you accusing me of here?
    Huxley: You need to leave, John.
    Spartan: But Huxley.
    Huxley: Get out!
    Moments later Spartan is arrested for "violating" Huxley.

    By the way, that's called satire. Get over it.

  12. #102
    Ogre Araciel's Avatar
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    Overtime+after back workout...

    smurf THIS CHAIR

  13. #103
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Tigmafuzz's Avatar
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Clo View Post
    I'll feed that stray cat!
    How is that a bad idea in any way?
    Face

    ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ส้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้

  14. #104
    Recognized Member Shorty's Avatar
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    Ignore early flight check in.

  15. #105
    Fei Gone Wrong Polnareff's Avatar
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    Default

    My bad idea for today was even getting the hell out of bed.

    Let's see here.....

    -car kept randomly shutting off
    -had to go to the welfare office, which was crowded as smurf
    -tried to go online at the library to send in a form. Computer kept crashing
    -hung out with a friend, who unfortunately brought a bunch of kids I didn't know with her. One of these kids kept mentioning a place I wanna eventually go
    -felt like a fifth wheel the whole time I hung out with said friend
    -mom being weird as usual and smurfing taking medication while being drunk
    -crush not talking to me, and when she does she never tells me anything (I wonder if she'll see this :P )
    -PSP generally smurfing up, which is what I play to relieve stress
    -the worst one of all, I have to go to work at 8 tomorrow morning. :/
    Xenogears is the tragic story of how your whole life can take a crappy turn, just because you happened to see a lady in a wedding dress before her wedding.

    This boy is crackin' up, this boy has broken down
    This boy is crackin' up, this boy has broke down

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