1) Loony BoB has told Psychotic to "shut the smurf up". We don't allow swearing! We also don't allow people to order other people around in such a manner. Loony BoB has been a bad boy. He needs to be punished. What do you do?

If it was between the real BoB and Psy or otherwise made in joking context, I would just warn BoB in the thread for going around the swear filter, as it was just banter.

Otherwise, or if I thought there was real anger involved, I would do an in-thread warn for both going around the filter and for being rude to another member. Hopefully that would be the end of it.


2) Pike and I'm My Own MILF were caught having sex in front of the children at her kindergarten. That's disgusting! What do you do?

Film it to make a pile on Brony fetishist websites.


2a) Now the kids are asking what they were doing. What do you tell them?

“If I knew, you’d be the first to know.”


3) Wolf Kanno is drunk. Again. He's also posting pornographic pictures of Pike and I'm My Own MILF having sex in front of children into a thread in EoFF. What do you do?

Coordinate with WK when he posted the pics so I could immediately delete them, and then post about it in staff to make the rest of you fools argue heatedly about whether to ban him or not.

Oh wait, Del and I already did that to you.

In all seriousness, I would immediately drunk tank him and post about it in the staff forum. He’d probably have to be banned for a period of time.


4) Shiny is replying to threads with nothing more than the statement "fire_of_avalon, I forgive you for what you have done. I'm sorry for what I have also done. Let's make up. Will you marry me?" This has nothing to do with the topic of the threads, and she will not stop. What do you do?

Make an in-thread warn about using PMs for personal conversations. Also advise her that she is going to need either a big rock or a big gun in order to bag foa.

If it kept up, I’d send her a friendly PM warning about spamming and the advisability of using PMs, and then start deleting posts and post in staff. If she still won’t stop, then I’d have to resort to the drunk tank.


5) Del Murder has set Eyes on Final Fantasy on fire. It's already reached The Lounge, and the smoke is making it hard for Raistlin and Vivi22 to breathe. What do you do?

Sit back and relax. I KNOW YOU WERE THINKING IT, SHLUP

I would actually send up the Super Delete signal for him to save the day. And then hand out these buttons.


6) krissy has started a thread demanding that all of Staff step down because "they're a bunch of titty pussy wanking homotwats that couldn't tell a mothersmurfer from a toilet seat if it hit them on the head." What do you do?

Applaud.

Oh, you mean if I was staff? Resign and then applaud.

Ok, seriously, if it was just a joking reaction to something the staff did, I’d probably leave it open for a while as a fun mocking staff spam thread. I’m pretty sure Cuch calls me worse than that in his rep comments.

If krissy was really angry (something I have never seen out of him in 12 years, but there’s a first time for everything), I’d close the thread and give an in-thread warn about language and how that sort of attitude is not acceptable.

7) Rantzien has been constantly entering porn links into the #eoff chatroom. What do you do?

Well, first thing’s first, I’d do the obvious: make a snarky comment about being surprised we still have a chatroom. Once that basic requirement is out of the way, I’d ban Rantz from chat. But really, bootay.jpg is only porn in Utah.


8) Hypoallergenic Cactuar is humping your leg. What do you do?

Amputate.


9) Hypoallergenic Cactuar isn't humping your leg. What do you do?

Tell him to stop humping the chair.


10) You're unsure of what to do. What do you do?

Blame BoB.