Now I'm the king of South London, ooh
I worked for HMV
The waitress said "stop!"
When I did a huge plop
And that's what's bothering Steve

I wanna be a man, Eyes on
And have a night on the town
And be just like the other men
I'm tired of poo dropping down

Oh, ooh bee doo
Don't wanna do a big poooooooo
All over you
Or in my shoe
It's truuuuuue!

You see it's truuuuuueeee
A guy like Steeeeeve
Can learn to be
Potty trained toooooooo!