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Thread: I am a smurfing awful human being.

  1. #91
    Taking care of business Bubba's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Unbreakable Will View Post
    I feel better with that knowledge, you are forgiven.
    I don't want your forgiveness. I want your family as my slaves.

  2. #92
    Dinner is served. Unbreakable Will's Avatar
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    Impossible, they are already owned. By me.

    Because I'm one hell of a butler.

  3. #93
    Eggstreme Wheelie Jiro's Avatar
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    Slave family... hmmm.

    They see me rolling. They hating, patrolling.
    Trying to catch me riding dirty.


  4. #94
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Tigmafuzz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shiny View Post
    One time this girl asked me if she was fat and I said yes.
    I have done this. But there's nothing wrong with being honest. She asked me if her dress made her look fat and I said "no, your FAT makes you look fat." She looked heartbroken. But she was probably somewhere between 7-9 on the so-obese-you-can-barely-stand-on-this scale so she probably shouldn't have asked in the first place.
    Face

    ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ส้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้

  5. #95
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Raistlin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shiny View Post
    One time this girl asked me if she was fat and I said yes.
    I do this to my little sister (who is not fat).

  6. #96
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Tigmafuzz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AmariaSama View Post
    WHY DOES EVERYTHING I TOUCH DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?
    Don't ever touch me.
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    ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ส้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้

  7. #97
    Wildökarudo Mercen-X's Avatar
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    I've stopped saying "God bless you" whenever my dad sneezes.

    Deadpool:
    As a mercenary, my first loyalty is to my hand. My right hand to be precise. Don't tell lefty, he gets jealous.
    My pal, Dexter, and I have had a longstanding on-and-off romance. I've proposed to her multiple times but she always says she's still young and wants to explore her sexuality while men are still interested. Well, men and women. She strokes both ways. That's a double entendre.

  8. #98
    can we sleep now? drotato's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tigmafuzz View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by AmariaSama View Post
    WHY DOES EVERYTHING I TOUCH DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?
    Don't ever touch me.
    Why nots? Don't you wanna die?

  9. #99
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Tigmafuzz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AmariaSama View Post
    Why nots? Don't you wanna die?
    Not... not just yet. And not like that
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    ส็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็็༼ ຈل͜ຈ༽ส้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้้

  10. #100
    can we sleep now? drotato's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tigmafuzz View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by AmariaSama View Post
    Why nots? Don't you wanna die?
    Not... not just yet. And not like that
    Oh.... Well uh.... Okay then. < . <

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