I have had to turn my settings -WAY- down in order to play this game. It took a long time for me to get this game to run at something other than 'barely moving' speed, so I understand your frustration.
I honestly -hate- Crystal Tools (the engine for this game). I still think it was a serious mistake of Square-Enix to make that the engine for this game.
I am hoping that A Realm Reborn at least will make it so that almost anyone can play, by lowering the PC requirements...