Best Song 
  
The Nominees 
Aerith's Theme - FFVII · 
Answers - FFXIV · 
Battle at the Big Bridge - FFV · 
Eyes on Me - FFVIII · 
Liberi Fatali - FFVIII · 
Melodies of Life - FFIX · 
One Winged Angel - FFVII · 
Rose of May - FFIX · 
Suteki Da Ne - FFX · 
Terra's Theme - FFVI · 
You're Not Alone - FFIX
Please give a warm welcome to the presenters of this award...
Edward & Golbez
 
 
 
Edward: And now, for the most significant award of the event, which rewards the greatest music of our worlds with boundless prestige~!  It is the one...the only...
Best Song!
Golbez: ... 
Now do you people understand why I bombed the stuffing out of his country?
Edward: The candidates:
The FFVI Opera House orchestra being playing Aerith's Theme.
Edward: *wipes away a tear*  Such a poignant, moving theme!  How could anyone fail to be inspired?
Golbez: Easy: By not being a wanker.
The orchestra change a page and Answers is played.
Golbez: Actually, this song isn't half bad.  Brooding and melancholy, just the way I like it.
Edward: You 
would approve of any song that raises the suicide rate by a statistically significant margin wherever it is played.
The music then shifts to Battle on the Big Bridge.
Edward: A powerful, stirring anthem!  With every note, it raises spirits and martial wrath!  The perfect theme to play while shooting down the Red Wings!
Golbez: Yeah, that really worked out well for you, didn't it?
A piano solo kicks in for Eyes on Me.
Golbez: Complete rubbish.  This is the kind of song that weak-willed fool Kain would like.
Edward: *sighing* Oh, Anna...
Suddenly, Liberi Fatali catches everyone's attention.
Edward: An upbeat, powerful theme.  The Latin chanting gives it a certain...I don't know what...
Golbez: Incomprehensibility?
Melodies of Life is sung.
Golbez: If this song gets any more cloying I swear I will literally puke.
Edward: It is so...rich, so poignant...LIFE IS WONDERFUL!
Golbez: *vomits all over Edward*
The song One Winged Angel bursts into life.
Golbez: Bells, sparks, Italy, eat a bell, Batman pees
Edward: Sephiroth!
The orchestra switch over to Rose of May.
Golbez: Let me guess, Edward:  Poignant, moving, and beautiful?
Edward: No, even I think this song sucks.
The sounds of Suteki Da Ne flow through the Opera House.
Edward: This sounds like a song I'd write:  fraught with emotion, and well placed changes of tempo.  I only wonder what the words mean?
Golbez: It's a recipe for General Tso's Chicken.
Terra'a Theme meets the ears of all in attendance.
Edward: OK, big reveal time:  I actually 
did write this song, but my version was better.  Why did Uematsu change it to piano instead of harp?
Golbez: Because the 16th century is over?
The orchestra finish off with You're Not Alone.
Golbez: This one is actually quite good.  It's got enough energy to bomb a country to.
Edward: What, you mean there's actually a song you don't hate?
Golbez: I'll have to think on that.  Come on, let's just announce this thing.  And the winner is...