Arrested Development quotes thread

[The Man]

I'll be your wingman. Even if it means me taking a chubby, I will suck it up.

[Nicolas]

I'm afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run if you will, so I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.

[The Man]

Oh, no, no, I'm not in the group yet. I'm afraid I just... blue myself.

[Nicolas]

Michael if I may take off my pants and pull my analrapist stocking over my head, I think George Michael may be suffering from what we in the soft-sciences call "Obsessive Compulsive Disorder", or the "The O.C. Disorder".

[The Man]

Don't call it that.

[I Took the Red Pill]

I, uh, think I made the fire a little too real, uh, for them

[The Man]

Jessie: There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town.
Tobias: Well, that certainly leaves me out. [Everyone looks at Tobias] You said "single," right? She said "single."

[Værn]

GOB: You're a good guy, mon frere. That means brother in French. I don't know why I know that, I took four years of Spanish.


Also, everything that Tobias ever says.

[Denmark]

ooc: "Arrested Development quotes" more like "Tobias Fünke quotes" amirite (not complaining)

COME ON!

[The Man]

There's always money in the banana stand.

[Jowy]

Mrs. Featherbottom: O-kay, who'd like a banger in the mouth?
Mrs. Featherbottom: Right, I forgot, here in the States, you call it a *sausage* in the mouth.
Michael: We just call it a sausage.

[The Man]

[Jinx]

I was debating putting this, just because it is single-handedly to me, the funniest scene from Arrested Development.

We shan't be telling your mother, shan't we?

[The Man]

I think I might have to agree, although there are a lot of contenders for that mantle.

Jessie: Your father's religious now? We'll play that up. It's very sympathetic.
Lucille: Yeah. Who doesn't love the Jews?

[Lonely Paper Star]

Don't have a quote, but I come bearing .gifs:

(SPOILER)