I don't remember making any resolutions last year but I'm going to set some realistic ones this time round.

- Maintain/slightly increase my current weight
- Continue consuming alcohol
- Talk to myself in the mirror when drunk
- Play lots of computer games
- Pass the dutchie on the left hand side
- Laugh at any dog that is wearing one of those cone collars.
- Convince a new group of people that my Dad was the voice of Uncle Bulgaria in the Wombles... when he wasn't.