I'm seriously dying here, daughter xD
I'm seriously dying here, daughter xD
Formy, my life is a comedy sketch, unfortunately. >.<Originally Posted by Formalhaut
There's no unfortunately about it! You have the gift of inadvertent humour; use it wisely!
Most of the awkward and embarrassing things happened during middle school. Let's just say that I had to go.
Apparently, I have been declared banished.
I've posted this before, but:
Back in September, I was walking around campus. I have this dress that's sort of a pain, because it doesn't stay down like it's supposed to. Anyways, I've got my boots on, and my little backpack, just walking along. I noticed that my legs felt awfully cool, and when I reached behind me, I realized that my dress had flown up about my waist. My bum and tights were just hanging out for the whole world to see. I put my dress down and kept my hand on it the entire way to my car.
There were only 3 or so people around, but I have no idea if anyone saw. ;-;
I once called Loony BoB and people overheard me
haha. Oh god, if I told you all the stories where one of my nieces or nephews made me look an idiot I'd be here all night and weekend. Most recently I wasn't paying my youngest Niece Chloe enough attention, she's not quite 2 yet and so she decided rather than yell "Hey!" at me again (she can't say my name though she's called me "nom nom nom" before. I don't know why I'm tasty I just am) she decided to run at me and punch me with both her little fists right in the daddy sacks in front of a room full of people. I was in pain, I wanted to cry a 2 stone lump had sprinted as fast as she can at me and launched herself fist first in to my balls. For someone who manages to avoid being hurt in some pretty serious trout or reacting to pain in some pretty serious situations I was left gasping for air by a 2 year old.
Whenever I'm around a toddler I feel petrified of getting snot on me.
I once called Lynx and suddenly found myself talking to PG.
A conversation I had with someone on Tuesday night resulted in awkward behavior which lasted all night and throughout the next day. Anyone who has been following my updates knows who I'm referring to.
Jack: How do you know?
Will: It's more of a feeling really.
Jack: Well, that's not scientific. Feeling isn't knowing. Feeling is believing. If you believe it, you can't know because there's no knowing what you believe. Then again, no one should believe what they know either. Once you know anything that anything becomes unbelievable if only by virtue of the fact you now... know it. You know?
Will: No.
If Demolition Man were remade today
Huxley: What's wrong? You broke contact.
Spartan: Contact? I didn't even touch you.
Huxley: Don't you want to make love?
Spartan: Is that what you call this? Why don't we just do it the old-fashioned way?
Huxley: NO!
Spartan: Whoa! Okay, calm down.
Huxley: Don't tell me to calm down!
Spartan: What's gotten into you? 'Cause it sure as hell wasn't me.
Huxley: Physical relations in the way of intercourse are no longer acceptable John Spartan.
Spartan: What? Why the hell not?
Huxley: It's the law, John. And for your information, the very idea that you suggested it makes me feel personally violated.
Spartan: Wait a minute... violated? Huxley what the hell are you accusing me of here?
Huxley: You need to leave, John.
Spartan: But Huxley.
Huxley: Get out!
Moments later Spartan is arrested for "violating" Huxley.
By the way, that's called satire. Get over it.
Dish.
I posted in another thread with this story so through the magic of paraphrasing I shall post it here again!
I was wearing a new pair of boots with thinner heels than I'm used too. I was walking and talking and got a bit distracted.
Basically, I started repeating in my head to myself "okay, now...right...left...check the floor...again, right...left...yeah, yeah, there you go sister!"
Then I thought "Oh wow, this floor is slippery!Oh shi...!". Rolled mental dices, 8, success - balance regained!...That lasted like one second, floor rolled dices too, critical success! Floor used 'COME DOWN ON MAH BELLEH!' attack and I awkwardly fell flat on my face.
In the middle of a supermarket....
Hehehehehe. You suck!
I am familiar with no one by the name of Dish. And no, it was not a dish either.
Jack: How do you know?
Will: It's more of a feeling really.
Jack: Well, that's not scientific. Feeling isn't knowing. Feeling is believing. If you believe it, you can't know because there's no knowing what you believe. Then again, no one should believe what they know either. Once you know anything that anything becomes unbelievable if only by virtue of the fact you now... know it. You know?
Will: No.
If Demolition Man were remade today
Huxley: What's wrong? You broke contact.
Spartan: Contact? I didn't even touch you.
Huxley: Don't you want to make love?
Spartan: Is that what you call this? Why don't we just do it the old-fashioned way?
Huxley: NO!
Spartan: Whoa! Okay, calm down.
Huxley: Don't tell me to calm down!
Spartan: What's gotten into you? 'Cause it sure as hell wasn't me.
Huxley: Physical relations in the way of intercourse are no longer acceptable John Spartan.
Spartan: What? Why the hell not?
Huxley: It's the law, John. And for your information, the very idea that you suggested it makes me feel personally violated.
Spartan: Wait a minute... violated? Huxley what the hell are you accusing me of here?
Huxley: You need to leave, John.
Spartan: But Huxley.
Huxley: Get out!
Moments later Spartan is arrested for "violating" Huxley.
By the way, that's called satire. Get over it.
in grade 7 i had a meltdown after an improv session went terribly wrong
in front of the audience of the entire class
anime tears
Once at a work dinner a couple that I play GW2 withs child completely snatched up a very well endowed older ladys breast. Like two handed squeeze. she screetched at the top of her lungs so loud. she also had a very low cut shirt. actually now that I think about it it was a sweatshirt with the neck cut down. anyways the mom was SUPER embarrassed and I'm sure felt very awkward. He husband basically just giggled and her son seemed very pleased with himself.
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