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Thread: Go Hug a Tree, You Tree Huggers!

  1. #1
    Being Pooh. Chris's Avatar
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    Default Go Hug a Tree, You Tree Huggers!

    Serious question.

    How "green" are you?



  2. #2
    Happiness Hurricane!! Pike's Avatar
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    inb4 Shorty shows up and puts everyone to shame

  3. #3

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    turn off lights, recycle, blah blah easy stuff

    the pants i'm wearing are 100% green

  4. #4
    Jinx's Avatar
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    Not very. I leave lights on, I use hairspray, I drive a car, I don't recycle.
    Quote Originally Posted by Fynn View Post
    Jinx you are absolutely smurfing insane. Never change.

  5. #5
    absolutely haram Recognized Member Madame Adequate's Avatar
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    My motto used to be "Earth first! We'll pave the other planets later!" but honestly concrete just doesn't cut it for me anymore. It can be cracked and even grown through by vile plants. No, we need something even more brutal if we are going to destroy the all-devouring menace that is nature. What I now support is metal plating. I want to cover the entire surface of the planet in feet-thick plates of solid steel, upon which we will live and build our civilization. Ultimately we should seek to turn every other body in the solar system - and eventually the galaxy and the universe itself - into a similar metal ball. Under the surfaces of these our nanotechnological crucibles will work eternally to convert all matter into heavy metals, until it is not merely a few paltry feet of metal plating but a ball of solid metal. We shall also take the hills and mountains and fill in the empty lakes and seas, so that the surface of the Earth is regular and smooth. Even tectonics shall bow to our indomitable Human will.

    Our civilization will be one whose primary purpose is to build grim monuments out of stone and metal. We shall convert ourselves into perfect, immortal machines to remove the need for food and air, and shall use belching coal furnaces, oil generators, nuclear plants, and so on in order to power ourselves. We will cover the entire planet in our numbers, we will boil away the seas, slash and burn every last piece of woodland, slam vast sheets of metal down on every field, and never for one moment relent in our crusade to eradicate all nature and replace it with perfect machinery. Nature is evil, brutal, and disgusting, and must be opposed at every turn. To replace nature with the creations of intelligence and industry is the highest task which our species can turn itself to. To build vast skyscrapers, factory complexes the size of cities, to turn the sky black with pollution and smog - these are our holy duties.

    Serve Humanity: Chop a tree!

  6. #6
    Huh? Flower?! What the hell?! Administrator Psychotic's Avatar
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    You know what looking after the environment is?

    Transferring wealth from me (in the form of time and/or money or even convienience) to the peoples of the future (in the form of resources, air quality, convienience and so on)

    Those smurfers are going to be richer than me anyway. Why the smurf am I making myself poorer to make people already richer than me richer?

    Environmentalism being rammed down my throat as if it's some sort of moral obligation smurfing sickens me. smurf the environment, environmentalism is the biggest pile of trout ever, i hope the god damn ozone layer burns

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    absolutely haram Recognized Member Madame Adequate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Psychotic View Post
    You know what looking after the environment is?

    Transferring wealth from me (in the form of time and/or money or even convienience) to the peoples of the future (in the form of resources, air quality, convienience and so on)

    Those smurfers are going to be richer than me anyway. Why the smurf am I making myself poorer to make people already richer than me richer?

    Environmentalism being rammed down my throat as if it's some sort of moral obligation smurfing sickens me. smurf the environment, environmentalism is the biggest pile of trout ever, i hope the god damn ozone layer burns
    Quote Originally Posted by CEO Nwabudike Morgan, 'The Ethics of Greed'
    Resources exist to be consumed. And consumed they will be, if not by this generation then by some future. By what right does this forgotten future seek to deny us our birthright? None I say! Let us take what is ours, chew and eat our fill.

  8. #8
    Huh? Flower?! What the hell?! Administrator Psychotic's Avatar
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    Damn straight. You didn't see the people in the Industrial Revolution saying "Ohhhhh trout! What about the poor folk of the 21st Century having to deal with our troutty polluted rivers and rise in global temperatures caused by our wanton resource consumption!" did you? They said "smurf you!" to us and I say the same thing to the people of the 22nd Century. If the future folk end up reading this somehow, go dig up my corpse and suck my dick... oh wait you can't because you're choking on the poison fumes that make up the Earth's atmosphere, losers.

    In further Morganist views, I support low-level environmentalism (eg recycling household waste) only if it creates jobs and is more economically viable than mining fresh resources.

  9. #9
    Being Pooh. Chris's Avatar
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    ...I am slightly turned on by Psy right now.



  10. #10
    GO! use leech seed! qwertysaur's Avatar
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    Take a guess.

  11. #11
    Recognized Member Shorty's Avatar
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    I'm a realist hippy. This earth is a lost cause and we should be scouting for new planets.

    At work, I'm green because I feel guilty. My place of work really, really tries to enforce everyone to use the recycling and compost bins that we have in all of our kitchens. It kindof works, but mostly not, and some people still throw everything in the trash. At home, though, I'm lazy, and everything goes in the trash.

    I use my car for everything, including going to the grocery store down the street and around the corner and going to my job that is a mile away. cba to get up twenty minutes earlier in order to walk and who the hell wants to do that when they have a car?

    All in all, I'm a pretty terrible hippy.

  12. #12
    Slothstronaut Recognized Member Slothy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shorty View Post
    I'm a realist hippy. This earth is a lost cause and we should be scouting for new planets.
    I wouldn't say the Earth is a total lost cause yet, but we are doomed if we stay here. Time to spread out so we get some breathing room. In the mean time, I whole heartedly support culling those I dislike and further advancement in automation so we can maintain and improve the quality of life I presently enjoy.

  13. #13
    absolutely haram Recognized Member Madame Adequate's Avatar
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    "Do you want to be at treehugger Sarah?"
    "No. I want to be the treehugger."

  14. #14
    ...you hot, salty nut! Recognized Member fire_of_avalon's Avatar
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    Y'all mothasmurfas need Captain Planet.

    Signature by rubah. I think.

  15. #15
    4 Recognized Member Faris's Avatar
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    Right now the city is basically enforcing us to reduce our waste and recycle basically everything. It's a bit annoying because my trash of tissues is now overflowing week by week. Oh well and if it's inconvenient or exponentially more expensive to be environmentally friendly then smurf that.



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