I kicked a duck in the face the other day,

The duck said, "Ack, that really hurt! Why would you do that?"

I replied, "Because you didn't pay your bill."

"Well I'll be sure to be on time next month, now if you'll excuse me I have to see my doctor." said the duck.

"Oh? Which doctor?" I questioned, "I'm looking for a new one you see, my old one was a bit of a quack."

The duck merely gave me a fowl look and flew off to his appointment.