Mafia XXV: Action Movie Badasses Game Thread Day 6

[[M] Joe - Army Dad]

Also, I'm sure you have noticed, but there have been plenty of nightkills. Maybe not the most effective ones, but they're there. I don't know why you idiots shot at Daniel Craig twice, but I suppose a rookie wouldn't consider the possibility of a Nexus. It's okay Arnold, don't cry. We can't all be veterans. We can't all play a solid game as the loudest member of the Town and force the scum to target elsewhere.

Paying attention to the nightkills is probably the best place for your training to begin, buttmonkey. Especially if you're on the Mafia. I mean, seriously? Come on. You made this too damn easy.

[[M] Joe - Army Dad]

I know it is hard but we're going to go over some techniques for deciding nightkills. I know that you are a colossal imbecile, but work with me here.

[[M] Mom – Host]

My mistake, there 5 left, 3 to majority lynch.

[[M] Gaius]

I thought this was a classic showdown between good and evil and then you said buttmonkey, and I can't have any respect for you any more at all. Why did you have to destroy everything we had going?

[[M] Gaius]

(Let's see how long the coward stands behind his vote now.)

Go ahead though, Mr. Jackson, I'm all ears.

[[M] Joe - Army Dad]

First: The Potshot

It's night one. Nobody stands out. Nobody has made any hints at roles. What do you do? You take a shot in the dark. You pick an account with average levels of activity, because the louder a person is, the more chances they have to get themselves lynched. So you pick off one of the fringe dwellers, and nobody can pin it on anyone.

Second: The Incriminator

Player X has been gunning for Player Y pretty hard. They're both townies, because you're the dirty scum sucker. You shoot Player X, and suddenly, Player Y is looking pretty smurfing suspicious. Has the added benefit of potentially forcing a townsperson lynch. Double kill.

Third: Power Limiter

You spot someone talking about the Doctor, or the Cop. You shoot them. People who discuss roles like that are either scum or hinting at being it. If not, who cares? Townie still dies.

That concludes our first lesson.

[[M] Gaius]

But professor Jackson, what if they're a Nexus?

[[M] Joe - Army Dad]

Your move, mothersmurfer. Who wants to hammer the Doctor?

I was always perfectly aware of what my vote would do, even if your small mind cannot process it Arnold. I should explain what a hammer vote is though, because you are obviously still just a rookie who doesn't get the complexities of the game. You should really have asked Nicolas Cage for some help, he is quite the academic and Citizen Bleys is one of my favourite players of all time (all time). A hammer vote is the vote that secures a majority lynch.

If you're gonna call me a coward, show some balls of your own some time.

[[M] Joe - Army Dad]

But professor Jackson, what if they're a Nexus?

Then you lynch them instead of shooting at them twice, you nonce. Jesus, you really are mentally stunted due to steroid use. Maybe no hope remains.

[[M] Joe - Army Dad]

what

Clearly they don't speak English in what, 'cause you have no smurfing idea.

[[M] Gaius]

Right, because attacking the loudest and second most secure player in the game is a coward's move.

[[M] Joe - Army Dad]

Right, because attacking the loudest and second most secure player in the game is a coward's move.

There is a difference between brave and suicide, bucko. You'll figure it out one day, maybe.

[[M] Gaius]

As a courtesy: are you sure you're not using yourself up, you crafty old vet? Don't you want to save some of this for when there's people around to hear you? I know how much that means to you.

[[M] Joe - Army Dad]

Hey, Teddy Roosevelt, what d'ya say we just cut these shenanigans now and end the day with a Sammy L Jackson lynch? I ain't got time to deal with mothersmurfers like this guy. It's a waste of my valuable time and having already won the game, I got better things to do.

[[M] Joe - Army Dad]

As a courtesy: are you sure you're not using yourself up, you crafty old vet? Don't you want to save some of this for when there's people around to hear you? I know how much that means to you.

I don't need people to hear me. They already heard me. They already saw my brilliance. It's done. Over. I win, Arnold. You lose.