King of the hill!

[Spooniest]

The master is the student, and the student is the master.

I become your student, and hence, your master.

The hill is mine.

[qwertysaur]

qwertysaur uses leech seed!
It's super effective!
The wild Spooniest fainted!
qwertysaur obtains the hill.

[Formalhaut]

A wild Formalhaut has appeared!

qwertysaur uses Leech Seed!

Formalhaut avoided the attack!

Formalhaut uses Weedkiller!

It's super effective!

The wild qwertysaur fainted!

Formalhaut obtains the hill.

[Jinx]

Tifa's Boobs goes Nuzlocke.

Tifa's Boobs takes the hill.

[Spooniest]

Tifa's Boobs comes running at me with a Masamune. I wrench it out of her hands and slash her mercilessly, and she falls in slow motion down to the foot of a flight of stairs, without her hat falling off.

I enter the Jenova chamber and take the hill.

[Synoptikal]

I charge into the Jenova Chamber, Buster Sword in hand. Spooniest overpowers me and stabs me with Masamune but I, inexplicably, gain control of the situation, forcing Spooniest to lower Masamune, allowing me to gain purchase upon my feet. I lift Spooniest, still holding Masamune and throw him down into the depths of the reactor.

Thus securing the hill for my own.

[Spooniest]

I enter the lifestream, take control of Jenova, and manipulate you into bringing me the Black Materia, and summon Meteor to exert my dominance over all life.

And the hill.

[Synoptikal]

I collaborate with a ragtag group of fighters, enter the Northern Cave, fight your mother, your two final stages and rid your presence from my mind.

And the hill.

[Jinx]

You're living a life based on someone else's memories. You end up catatonic is Mideel.

I take the hill.

[Synoptikal]

Thanks to you and your boobs, you help me find my own memories and existance and I break my sickness. I lure you and your boobs into a lulled sense of security while my cohorts are off finding their reasons to fight and take the hill from you in the process.

[Spooniest]

I release a compilation that ruins all your character development.

Hill: population me and all my money.

[Synoptikal]

I release two games with an obnoxious blonde protagonist who cannot fake laugh and ruin all your back story.

The hill belongs to Shinra!

[Spooniest]

I am Dragon Quest 8 and I kick the living hell out of your 2 games on the same system.

Boomshackalacka!

Hill.

[Formalhaut]

I push Spoony off the hill. Simple.

I take the hill.

[Synoptikal]

Aaaaaaaaand BACKHANDER!

You tumble down the hill. Claiming it was elementary! :3