I actually escaped to the bay and, once again, saw you sort of wandering around looking at the big words and scratching your shiny head and i sorta sprinted as fast as i could and swan dived over the barriers and into the murky cardiff bay waters. i swam to a tour boat and ate some welsh cakes and watched you from afar.

it was a really impeccable dive and i wish you had seen it but that might have led to some kind of interaction which is exactly the opposite of what i was looking for