Fossilized Chocobo Eggs Discovered in Nevada Desert

[Shorty]

PHOTO: Newly discovered fossilized chocobo eggs have been found in Nevada.

BULLHEAD CITY, NV--U.S. paleontologists have reportedly unearthed what appears to be none other than fossilized chocobo eggs from an excavation site located deep within in the harsh Nevada desert.

Dr. Odine Leonidas Perrywinkel, lead paleontologist at the excavation site, was quoted as saying, "We anticipate that these eggs will yield a wealth of knowledge of ancient chocobo inhabitants in the area and we hope to uncover much more information about this little-known species. Our discovery expands the known range of prehistoric beasts and may provide a new understanding of life before our time." It could be that Dr. Perrywinkel had more information to offer, but such a thing was difficult to determine between the zany mumblings and noises he emitted, which were clouded in a thick German accent. He then advised that he could not comment further on the subject matter as he was late for golf and lemonade with the Headmaster of Nevada's Garden Academy.

Hojo Hollander, professor of geology at the New University of Nevada in Las Vegas, said the geologic and paleontologic communities did not previously conceive that it was possible to procure evidence of chocobos having once inhabited the ancient Nevada desert, even though there is evidence that forests and great bodies of water were located here during the Mesozoic age. Hollander has speculated that it is possible the chocobos may have even mated with dinosaurs, but added that his word should not be taken as gospel because he is no expert on reproduction, as his wife is often fond of reminding him.

The eggs will be put on display at the Paramecial Science Center and Exploratorium for the first time beginning in June of 2014, where they will be displayed for a year before relocating to a permanent home in the dedicated Hyne Museum, which houses many of the paleolithic discoveries made in the southwestern states.

[Freya]

I thought this was just nonsense when I first heard it on Luca Loudmouth talk radio but goodness it has Dr Perrywinkle quoted, totally legit.

[Laddy]

Has Mako science gone to far?

[Scotty_ffgamer]

Oh, that Hojo's wife. Always a riot.

Now someone needs to find non-fossilized Chocobo eggs. Or an actual Chocobo. They are my preferred method of transport.

[Freya]

These are ancient chocobos. The large ones. The ones said to fly, go along reefs, dive into deep water and climb mountains! Not the tiny ones we have today. I can only imagine what they looked like.

[Fynn]

There's no such thing as ancient chocobos! The world is only 6,000 years old!

[Scotty_ffgamer]

Don't be silly, Fynn. There is no world. The world ended sometime ago. I don't know what we are living in right now, but it definitely is not the world.

[Freya]

Was that when that clown guy destroyed it or was it that skanky lady showing off her cleavage? Or was it cause that thunder chick didn't save us. Man life is hard with all these so called villians running around.

[Scotty_ffgamer]

It was destroyed all of those times.I feel like the current world or whatever this is has to be only like twenty years old at most.

[The Man]

There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.

There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

[Lone Wolf Leonhart]

I wanted to believe this so badly.

For the smallest tiny miniest fraction of a split second I thought "wait are chocobos based off a real bird".

[Fynn]

What are you talking about? Are there no chocobos where you live?

[Mirage]

I wanted to believe this so badly.

For the smallest tiny miniest fraction of a split second I thought "wait are chocobos based off a real bird".

Ostrich says hello.

[Freya]

What are you talking about? Are there no chocobos where you live?

he may live on one of those weird outer continents.

[Mercen-X]

What creatures would we have to defile by mating them together in order to produce a irl chocobo? I'm being serious here, it's not impossible. A real-life Tigon has already been produce from interspecies breeding. Why not a chocobo? Obviously, an ostrich has to be involved. It is the largest living bird species on earth. Various species of parrot and cockatoo could be used to provide the colored plumage (and, who knows, maybe some of their flight genes will transfer as well). About the only differences between an ostrich and a chocobo anyway are its long snakish neck and its considerably shorter wingspan. Then again, maybe just mate the os with the nearly as large emu.