I find Ana’s musings that Christian might be ‘celibate’ or ‘saving himself’ laugh out loud funny given we all know how far from the truth that is. I’m looking forward to the moment poor, ignorant Ana realises how wrong she is.

Yes, because when an attractive, rich, and successful man rejects you, it's obviously because he's saving himself. Yes.

Ana, the girl who has never been drunk before, has champagne, five margaritas and decides that it’s time for a beer. Ana, the girl who has never been drunk before, is going to pass out before this night is through.

More like puke. I know she's never drank alcohol before, but doesn't she know she shouldn't mix booze? Especially if she has no tolerance for alcohol? Where are all of her friends? That camera guy? Spanish Inquisition Kate?

Christian figures out that Ana is drunk and demands she tell him which bar she is in. Ana dismisses this as him being ‘his usual control freak’. She hasn’t known him nearly long enough to have established his ‘usual’ and if this is in fact his usual, that would be setting off all sorts of alarms for a rational human being.

Apparently in this world it's totally normal for men you've only met three times before you rush to your side because you're out at a bar with friends and drinking is just the worst thing in the world. You need a white knight, sister.

After throwing up in the garden and regaining her senses, Ana asks Christian the completely valid question: ‘How did you find me?’ Apparently he tracked her phone. This man Ana just met wanted to pick her up because she sounded drunk, so he tracked her phone and found her. How romantic.

That's not creepy at all. Ana should probably head back to that bathroom because she's about to piss herself with excitement over being stalked by a guy like Christian Grey.