Let's Play Dragon Quest V!

[Pumpkin]

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Okay then!

Here is our new not new ally

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Her face is still a bit off

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Alright

So we eventually find where we're going, under a waterfall

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I agree it is beautiful scenery, but the way she talks bugs me a bit.

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I had wasted some items in preparation of a difficult boss fight, like the one fought in the volcano, but there was nothing!!!

So I head back and seem to interrupt a family dinner (minus Debora)

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Since I have, he gets super excited and confesses he's already planned my wedding for me.

Goodness this man is a control freak

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Nera is so sweet

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OKAY

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I apparently can't sleep so I go around town talking to men who encourage me to marry both

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There are my options, summed up

I go talk to Bianca who puts on a brave face

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And I go talk to Mr. Spaghetti

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Well how kind of him!

I go back to bed, wake up the next morning, and am summoned to the mansion

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Then Debora comes down and decides she wants in on the action

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Mr. Spaghetti is displeased about this behavior, but Debora lines up next to her sister anyway

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Who will I marry?

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Stay tuned to find out!

[Skyblade]

Ok, I wasn't expecting this. It's suddenly like we're playing a Harvest Moon game instead of a Dragon Quest game. Except we don't have as much opportunity to get to know the bachelorettes.

Do you want us to vote?

Personally, I'd go for Bianca. I always preferred the old friend as the romantic interest, and you do know her better than any of the others. Plus she likes Saber, and Nera might be a dog person for all you know.

Also, I feel kind of bad for Deborah, but that's not really a reason to marry her.

[NeoCracker]

Deborah is smurfing awesome.

Bianca and Nera are both kind of bland as far as characters go, where as Deborah is a constant swirl of ass kicking.

I also like that she's the only one who, rather then being picked for marraige or having it arranged for her, steps right up and goes 'Yeah, smurf this noise. You're marrying me'.

[Pumpkin]

I know who I want to marry so I'm going to pretend you guys vote for her :P It took some debating with myself between two of them, but I had follow my video game heart

I'm super excited about this

[Pumpkin]

~*~WEDDING TIME~*~

It is time! Who shall I pick to spend the rest of my life with?

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Well that is disappointing

But now, to choose my wife!

I based this off of if these were real women and I wanted to marry one of them, who would I be happiest with?

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IT'S NERA!!!

She says all she can be for me is a good loyal wife. She isn't as adventurous or whatever as Bianca

I have chosen my bride!

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Why am I running errands for my own wedding?!?!

So I head over and fetch it and arrive back to everyone apparently skipping town on me?

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Oh, hi Harry!

Harry had informed him that I can use Zoom. So I Zoom us to his Casino ship, despite never having been there? Zoom has been holding out on me

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So I wake up in a strange bed

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Her father and someone else walk in and walk me through the wedding steps

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Oh dialogue!

IT IS PERFECTION ITSELF

Coming up, the wedding scene

[Pumpkin]

TIME FOR A WEDDING


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Nera then appears in front of and behind these giant flashing casino signs

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They even have casino bunny girls here. This is a classy afair

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We exchange rings and move on to our vows

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I lol'd at the resurrected part

It's hard to see, but Nera and Michael are kissing behind that heart

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Also classy

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I think this means we had to wait to consummate our love

Nera wakes me up and apologizes for her father forcing me to magic them all over the place

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OH MY GOSH EVERYTHING IS RED THE WORLD IS ON FIRE

Nera says she wants to help me find my mother. How sweet!

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Interesting...

Nera suggests we talk to her father about journeying with me

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In case you are wondering why you can't see Nera, it is because we have merged in to a single being

So we go see our dad who is shocked at the thought of her traveling with me.

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Then he comes up with a compromise

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HOW MANY THINGS DOES THIS MAN OWN

He tells me I have to go check on this pot because apparently he owns a shrine for a pot.

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We agree to this!

Also

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Exciting

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Oh my

And this is my new bride!

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Yaaaay

Tune in next time!

[Bolivar]

If we can get EoFF apparel, I want this on the shion shirt:

Don't be hatin cuz im better then u

HOW COULD NOT PICK BIANCA SHE'S THE CHILDHOOD SWEETHEART!?!?! That's cool it's on the Casino, though, I think the Bianca wedding was like a nighttime ceremony at the church iirc.

[Pumpkin]

I JUST DON'T LIKE HER THAT WAY BOLIVAR I'M SORRY

[NeoCracker]

I don't see how you could pick either one of them over Deborah. The they both suck.

[Pumpkin]

Nera and I head over to the place to check on the thing

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Alright. That was rather anticlimactic

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Something is fishy about this...

Then Nera brings up traveling again

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Yay

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Oh pasta jokes

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HOW RICH ARE YOU?!?!

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That is where casino ship is

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We have a new destination!

Also, I cannot stress this enough, Nera is the nicest person ever. She doesn't have a bad word to say about anyone. She says something if you speak to her after speaking to almost every NPC and it's all nice and positive. Even when giving constructive feedback, its still very kindly presented

Creepy guy? Compliment. Drunk? Compliment. Possible scam artist? Compliment.

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Is she a jealous wife?

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NOPE

(btw the women all look the same)

So I head over to the plac with the ship, the dock town, remembering only after I got there that I had zoom to teleport me. Oops

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I bought a cook ship in a bottle

Then I head over to casino ship and have a lot of fun and play a lot of poker and stuff

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I really would have liked nighttime Church wedding, honestly.

Also there are these super cute slime races

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They fall down and fall asleep and such. Much fun.

So I head south and find this small island

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This is all very interesting




to someone

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We have a goal! I do know this isn't where I was told to go, so I think it's a sidequest?

Anyways I head to the King Domiblah blah place which I stumble upon by pure chance and not by consulting a walkthrough

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Apparently he tried it for lots of things like a seat but found it hurt his bum

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*sigh*

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She had tried to use it as a chopping board among other things

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GOODNESS

So I head outside and rescue a poor crushed slime

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Alright

So I head back to the old dead guy and give him the medal

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YAY I GET A KNICK-KNACKERY!!!!

What will happen next? Tune in next time!

[Pumpkin]

Alright, I just want to start this post by saying I am loving this game! It's sweet and cute but it also has an interesting story. I look forward to playing it and I can't wait to see what happens next. I would highly recommend this game to anyone. It's awesome.

Now we were searching for that desert place and I find this old man

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Thank you random old man

So west I head and find a desert castle and I talk to people and someone mentions something about a desert rose

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I MUST HAVE THIS!!

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He recommends I stay at the Inn and get myself one in the morning. Which I do. It isn't as pretty as I was hoping :/

People here are all about talking about the Legen- wait for it DARY hero

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So at least we know we're on the right track

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I think she might be a relative.

I speak to Nera afterwards and she says she may seem that way but she isn't and says I should know.

YOU'VE DONE NOTHING BUT BE THE NICEST PERSON EVER NERA WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

So I find Cleoharta (hehe) who brings me to see the legendary Helm

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It doesn't fit me so she decides I'm not the hero

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Apparently the hero won't reveal himself until absolutely necessary. Nera theorizes that the hero probobly doesn't even know he's the hero and I suspect she's right because chances are its me.

Because I'm the main character in an RPG. That has legendary hero written all over it. And apparently I'm a prince too

Cleohatra tells me some stuff about myself

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East it is!!

I head east and stop by some hippie commune (I swear they're all hippies) and the nun tells me about some bad chakra or something in Gotha

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North it is!

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Her dad has literally sent 2 soldiers to drop stuff off for me. One was a piece of equipment for Nera and the other was like 2000 G or something. Geez man

So as I climb the mountain that I am told is dangerous (it is quite a feat) we find a weird old lady who laughs creepily and offers to let us stay in her house.

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I try to go check it out but I'm frozen to the bed

The old woman then comes down and tells me she cast a spell on em to make me sleep like the dead but it apparently didn't work

Then she tells me she found my sword and sharpened it

Am I going to be killed by my own weapon? BOSS FIGHT???

No, none of those things. She gives my sword back and I get +5 strength and then we feel like an ass for being so suspicious >.>

I continue though the mountain and arrive at a really nice snowy looking village where someone comments that Nera looks a little pale

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We bring her to the Inn and are told she's just fatigued

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After some rest, she wakes me up apologizing for passing out and excited to continue the adventure

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It should also be noted taht at this point in fights, Nera casts Death and makes the fights rather short

Will we find out more about Michael in Gotha? Tune in next time!

[Pumpkin]

Now that Nera has recovered, it is time for some exploring

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Hint hint

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Almost there!

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And we have officially confirmed me as Prince of Gotha

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Is the game trying to tell me something?

Anyways, I head down the mountain which, I gotta tell ya, is a job and a half.

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I though Sancho was dead

I finally arrive at Gotha where everywhere except one house is inside the castle walls.

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Ah

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Hmm

So I head outside to the random house and find Sancho! Who is incredibly happy to see me

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Ees a happy moment

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Yeah they weren't subtle about that.

So he takes us to see King Albert

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BY JOVE

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Nera also introduce herself and then collapses.




Again

[Pumpkin]

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What condition

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OHMIGOSH WHAT

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Wait.. what

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Albert is actually a really cool guy

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Yeah, JEEVES!!

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Ugh I hate these tasks

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Honestly I'm not sure sure why people dislike him as a king. Someone said he's too kind and someone else said the Chancellor is really running the show.

Is the Chancellor going to turn out evil?

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And next destination!

Sans Nera

Tune in next time!

[Skyblade]

Is the Chancellor going to turn out evil?

Either that, or a monster in disguise. Have you forgotten that bit of Chrono Trigger already?

If there is a good king, he has an evil chancellor. If there is an evil king, he has a good chancellor. If these conditions are not met, there will simply be no chancellor. Rule of fiction.

See also: Rule 131 of the Grand List of Console Role Playing Games Cliches.

First Rule of Politics (Chancellor's Axiom)
Any advisor of a major ruler has been scheming after his throne for quite a while. Thanks to the miracle of timing, you will arrive at the king's inner sanctum just in time for the coup.

[Pumpkin]

So I head to whatever place they told me to go to and find this stone slab

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Okay. Then I have to solve a series of puzzles because they don't want their king to be stupid. So I get the crest or whatever and start to head back

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Ugh always problems.

So I fight the guy and the other guy who is named Robbin' Hood. I defeat them and return to the castle.

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yea boi

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Well we know something bad is going to happen

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My goodness she gave birth fast. HOW LONG WAS I GONE?!

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D'aww

I am then asked to name them and I choose Logan for the boy and Millie for the girl

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I think my wife just politely insulted my baby names

Divorce

good job delivering twins I'm leaving you

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Word spreads quickly everywhere it seems

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Then she drops some stuff on me

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Well that would explai-

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Or... or not.

You had an out there, Dragon Quest. You should have taken it!

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I always let fortune tellers tell me how to raise my children

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Interesting.

Let's see what the babies think of this

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Mmhm Mhm, yes. Valid points.

Time to be coronated

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Sancho just cries at everything my goodness

So we celebrate and dance and party. But then things go black and I wake up and literally everyone is passed out on the floor.

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Time to go check on the family

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WHAT

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So Jeeves is missing and Nera is missing and I'm betting these two things are connected.

Before I leave in search of them I apparently decide to leave the Legendary sword with Senor Sancho

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Sure

Off to rescue my wife! Was it Jeeves? Is Jeeves a monster? Will I find my wife?

Tune in next time!