Let's Play Deus Ex badly

[Old Manus]

After the moderate success of Resident Evil 2, I was considering taking feedback on board and having a bash at RE3 or Dino Crisis, but to tell the truth I've had enough herb collecting, tank controls and loopy plotlines for one decade. Maybe another time. As it happens, I found myself with the sudden urge to reinstall the original Deus Ex (an urge I'm sure many of you are familiar with) to wile away the hours spent during these cold winter weekends wistfully staring out the window, waiting for the summer and its cricket season to come around again.

I go about it with no small amount of anxiety, as I know that there are people around who could make a far better job of it than me, but I do it anyway. For those who haven't read it, Sunglasses at Night is probably the best 'walkthrough' of any classic game there is as far as I'm concerned, and I admit it will be a struggle for me to not end up creating a carbon copy of it. This game is also a good 3-4 times as long as RE2 as well, so the chances of me giving up half way through have increased.

Does this game still stand up to today's standards? We'll see.

Part I: Liberty Island
(SPOILER)


It's Deus Ex!

We're playing on Easy because I don't give a toss.



Before starting a new game, you must buff out your character. This is JC Denton, nano-augmented supercop extraordinaire, with a penchant for dark trenchcoats, dark shades and dark senses of humour. You can give him a real name, but don't count on it ever being used in a meaningful way. We'll train him in computers, lockpicking, rifles, and beating people up with clubs (he is a cop, after all). We'll de-train him in pistols, which funnily enough makes no difference as once the game starts he'll be back trained in it anyway.

Behold:



We can leave behind 725 points as he will earn more over the course of the game and we can more quickly train in skills that aren't useless trout like swimming. Clicking Start Game brings us to the intro video that will make no sense to anybody on their first playthrough.



We're introduced to these two strange-looking blokes who are having a chat about some sort of deadly virus.



What filth. It's almost like an NHS hospital.

So the pre-amble: there is a virus loose on the streets of New York, and people without access to the vaccine (non-VIPs, essentially) are kicking off. There's been a terrorist attack on the Statue of Liberty, and JC's very own UNATCO is on hand to sort it out.



The United Nations Anti-Terrorist Coalition! They're like SWAT, except competent. And with huge robotic arms.

We're shipped into Liberty Island, ready to give those terrorists a kicking.



First, some mood music:



The game begins. We have a medkit, a pea-shooter and a cattle prod. There are a few bits of rubbish lying around, including a soda can and a forty (on the left of the picture). We'll pick up the forty and save it for later.

We also have JC's brother Paul Denton hauling ass towards us. Thus begins a quick game of cat and mouse, in order to see just what lengths he will go to to speak to JC. If you jump on top of a supply crate, he can't get to you, and instead will just stand and stare, judgmentally.



Unfortunately he ended up getting a bit too close and triggering the conversation.



"It's over Paul! I have the high ground!"



Paul offers you a choice of one of three weapons - a sniper rifle, a crossbow with tranquiliser darts, or a rocket launcher. As tempting as it is, we're not going to take the rocket launcher at this point in time. It takes up too much space in JC's inventory and has too little ammo. So we'll take the crossbow. Unfortunately, if you try and do a Fallout and just kill him to take all 3, you will find that he will get angry and kill you very quickly.


That done, JC quickly throws himself over the edge of the pier to break a few hidden boxes and get some goodies.





Quite a few goons around the corner. Luckily, all we have to do is wave the crowbar threateningly at them...



Lure them back to the pier...



And let the AT-ST and the (invincible) Paul turn them into finely ground mincemeat. Interestingly, this comes just after Paul has been extolling the absolute priority of non-violence in this operation. I've hurt nobody. Who have you killed today, Paul?

Next, it's time to break into the Statue. There's no sense taking them all on with the handful of bullets we have for our water pistol, so we have to do a bit of sneaking about. These two guys are obviously browsing EoEO as we creep past:



We can sneak up behind this guy and give him a zap from the prod to knock him out.



...but I screwed it up and had to beat him to death with the crowbar instead. Rip in peace



The room he's guarding contains the first of many 'datacubes' which the people of the future have a habit of just leaving lying around in the open. This one gives us the username and password to the security system at the front door and inside. We'll make use of it shortly.



We also track down this vaguely-Jack-Nicholson-looking tramp named Harley Filben, who gives us a key to the front door to the statue. We won't be using it.



This horrid-looking maiden is selling some weapons. We'll take some crossbow darts. On the way out, JC decides he has no other choice than to attack Filben with the crowbar. It turns out he is also invincible! This can only mean we'll need him later.




Time to break in. There's a heavily armed robot patrolling the area immediate to the front door, so let's get rid of it. Grab a box of TNT, place it carefully in the robot's path...





...then blow that smurfer up. The nearby guards come rushing over to investigate the explosion, but after a quick glance at the debris and a cursory look around, they conclude it must have been the wind and return to their patrols. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, a lot has changed in the last fifteen years, but dumb AI patrol procedures certainly haven't.

Now that security is lax, to the front door...



We use the famous datacube login data NSF001 and smashthestate to gain access to the panel and unlock the door. We can also switch off the cameras and turn the miniguns on the guards. When I did this, one of them, in his haste to get away, came crashing his way through the front door. Who needs a key?



We're in. This is just one of many ways of getting into the building. We could have also picked the lock, used the key Filben gave us, climbed through the hole above the door, or just completely ignored the front door altogether and climbed up the wall around the back. That would be boring, though.



There are a couple of patrols left in here that haven't been slaughtered by the rogue sentry guns. There is another crate of TNT sitting around as well as a lot of poisonous gas barrels. Not completely sure what they brought those here for. Regardless, we wait till the guard passes the TNT and blow him up again.



This also explodes the gas barrels and JC has to go and choke in the corner for a while till the air clears.

Meanwhile, let's engage in some serious theft!





A family is going hungry for a month.

As a secondary objective, we can rescue uber-mech Gunther Hermann from his cell. The guy is a grade-A tosser and I toyed with the idea of just leaving him there before deciding I'll do it, but only for the skill points. The way to his cell is guarded by a laser grid so we need to get our Solid Snake on.



A few bashed heads with the crowbar later and we've set him free.





He asks for a weapon, but JC tells him to piss off and heads upstairs.



Remember the forty we picked up earlier? Now's the time to drink it.

The inebriated JC approaches the terrorist leader.







( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

JC's alcoholism gets him into all sorts of trouble. Regardless, a quick reload and a bullet in the head of the terrorist scum brings the operation to a close...and the end of the Liberty Island stage! Next, off for a debrief at UNATCO HQ, which is incidentally a bunker just next to the statue.