So, this is me.


I don't drink, Eyes on Final Fantasy. This is an important piece of information because three days ago I woke up with an almighty hangover. Regretfully I didn't get to enjoy this, because what woke me up was the sound of five Cid's Knights kicking my front door in. Easy, right? The best resistance I could put up was to feebly vomit on scotty's shoes. smurfing crocs. In 2015. I did him a favour if you ask me.

I'm then thrown before a judge. The judge. Loony BoB himself. Apparently he'd held a very important meeting with Square-Enix on that night. Yes, that made sense, he had asked me to attend along with him as a representative of EoFF. What I hadn't counted on was the strength of the booze that night and me being the lightweight to end all lightweights.

Apparently, as Daniel had been sat around the table with various Square-Enix representatives, I had placed my erect penis on his shoulder (left) and announced this as "Good evening gentlemen, behold the true power behind the throne". As the collective lungs of Kitase, Tabata, Toriyama and various other Square-Enix employees who I am too lazy to Google drew in a gasp, I felt the need to break the awkward silence by saying "What? I'm pretty sure it's what Jesus would've done."

Long story short, lonny bob was very, very unhappy with your humble narrator. But hey, smurf it, it's just wacky Psychotic shenanigans, right? He didn't see it that way.


Well, smurf. So it turns out he really, really knows how to hold a grudge. I'm going to be stuck in this hellhole prison he made for seven years. Seven years! The inmates are a mixture of perverts, sadists, weasels and bronies. The guards aren't much better.


Do you want to be a part in this Let's Play? You can! A random prison inmate can be named after you! You don't have to do anything, but obviously the thread will be more fun if you get involved, have fun with it and live vicariously through your character.

I should point out the prisoner sprite breakdown is randomly generated, but if you say which one (1 to 6 going across, and bluebeard too!) you want I'll try, no promises, to get you one that looks like that. If everyone wants to be generic brown/blonde haired dude then it's not going to work because they're usually quite rare. I'm not gonna wait around here either, I'm gonna start tomorrow regardless and just assign any leftovers to whichever EoFFer names pop into my head first.

SIGN UP!
  1. Vivi22
  2. Jinx
  3. ToriJ
  4. Kalevala
  5. Sir Lancealot
  6. Bubba
  7. Karifean
  8. Aerith's Knight
  9. ???
  10. ???
  11. ???
  12. ???
  13. ???
  14. ???
  15. ???
  16. ???
  17. ???
  18. ???
  19. ???
  20. Officer Shauna
  21. Officer Scotty
  22. Officer Shiny
  23. Officer Pike
  24. Officer Quin
  25. Officer Matt
  26. Officer Pumpkin
  27. Officer LWL
  28. Officer Freya
  29. Officer Angus


I'm not staying in this trouthole at the whim of a dictator. You can imprison me, lonny bob, but I can and will escape and there is no force on this forum that can stop me.

Two weeks. That's all I need.