I own that scone!/That scone is gone!: The Great Debate

[Formalhaut]

Ah, but that's when it gets clever!

You have a choice of eating the whole scone if you're not in polite company (scones should be small enough to fit in your mouth whole. If not, then they're too large).

Or, you can have one half with just jam, and the other with just clotted cream. You can eat them one at at a time, or alternate between a bite of jam scone and a bite of clotted cream scone.

The third option is that you can smush the two halves together so that the jam half gets clotted cream on it, and the clotted cream half gets jam on it. Then, you can separate them and you have two halves which have both jam and clotted cream on them.

If you think he's this posh on-line, just wait until you meet him...

... I have to LIVE with this.

[Pheesh]

You're wrong because then you have to fit the whole scone in your mouth. Now, this may be socially acceptable with say a donut, or similar it is not proper etiquette for eating a Scone. Scones are eaten in halves. As such you should not sandwich them together. Even putting the poor etiquette aside, you have encountered a trap. The trap being that if you do that, sandwich them together, you get less cream and jam per scone. That's simply the worst idea when it comes to eating a scone. Ok, so maybe not as bad as butter and hot gravy but I must say, it's close.

Ah, but that's when it gets clever!

You have a choice of eating the whole scone if you're not in polite company (scones should be small enough to fit in your mouth whole. If not, then they're too large).

Or, you can have one half with just jam, and the other with just clotted cream. You can eat them one at at a time, or alternate between a bite of jam scone and a bite of clotted cream scone.

The third option is that you can smush the two halves together so that the jam half gets clotted cream on it, and the clotted cream half gets jam on it. Then, you can separate them and you have two halves which have both jam and clotted cream on them.

You literally just made up the part about the scone having to be small, or someone had misinformed you. Baking competitions have measurements for these things and both halves of a 'perfect scone' would not fit classily into your mouth. If a scone is flat enough to do that then you've either cut it too small in diameter (tbf, Night Fury makes mini scones like that and they are smurfing delicious) or it hasn't risen enough in the baking process, meaning it'll be unusually dense.

Don't smurf with someone whose girlfriend makes him watch that much Great British/Australian Bake Off.

[fire_of_avalon]

They look like biscuits. Hot butter and gravy is the way to go!

Yes. This is correct. Those photos are biscuits. Not the kind you say are biscuits which are actually cookies, but real biscuits. Murca biscuits.

Also, I've always heard it pronounced "scown" so that's how I've always said it.

I definitely read this like "frown" and am judging you, even though you clarified yourself later.

I still say fresh out of the oven, melted butter with gravy. The thing is a biscuit.

You just get better and better, don't you?

A scone is totally different than a biscuit and the thing in those photos is a biscuit.

Also, I am a biscuit girl all the way down to my toes. Don't try to tell me a biscuit is a scone. I will declare war on you. I have some infantry. They're toddlers. They will destroy you.

[Pheesh]

I had a 'biscuit' when I was in America a few times and it really tasted dry, dense and horrible. So if I had to guess the difference between the two: A scone is crumbly, delicious and satisfying, and a biscuit turns into some horrible mushy glue like substance that sticks to the roof of your mouth.

[fire_of_avalon]

If I recall correctly, you didn't spend much time in the southeast. So you don't know trout about biscuits, bes' fran. I'm ashamed of you.

I will make you a delicious, fluffy, butter biscuit and you will take them to your home country. Biscuits will rule the world. It will be glorious. All hail the biscuit overlord.

[Shorty]

how does it feel having your sconesy ass handed to you by an Australian steven

[Pheesh]

If I recall correctly, you didn't spend much time in the southeast. So you don't know trout about biscuits, bes' fran. I'm ashamed of you.

I will make you a delicious, fluffy, butter biscuit and you will take them to your home country. Biscuits will rule the world. It will be glorious. All hail the biscuit overlord.

Well when it comes to food I'm always willing to have my mind changed. Just promise that if I still don't like them you won't go 'full southerner' and hang me up by my britches or make me compete in a rodeo >.>

how does it feel having your sconesy ass handed to you by an Australian steven

I hate to say it dear but I think I was kinda agreeing with Steve more than anything. I know, I hate myself right now, too u_u

[Shorty]

What is happening in this world!

[Pheesh]

If it helps, I don't know what the smurf he was on about with the toilet paper thing. Assumedly he eats scones while taking a dump or something? :/

[Night Fury]

I had a huge scone last week with blackcurrant jam and clotted cream. It was the bomb. It was part of an afternoon tea tier selection. I could have just eaten a few of these bad boys.

I put the jam on, then the cream on top and it gets a little messy but oh so gooooooood.

[Mr. Carnelian]

You literally just made up the part about the scone having to be small, or someone had misinformed you. Baking competitions have measurements for these things and both halves of a 'perfect scone' would not fit classily into your mouth. If a scone is flat enough to do that then you've either cut it too small in diameter (tbf, Night Fury makes mini scones like that and they are smurfing delicious) or it hasn't risen enough in the baking process, meaning it'll be unusually dense.

Don't smurf with someone whose girlfriend makes him watch that much Great British/Australian Bake Off.

Sir, I think that you misapprehend me! I didn't mean to say that you should have to fit all of the scone into your mouth at once.

Rather, I meant to convey that it should be of such thickness that one can take a whole bite of it at once. I'm not sure that explanation is any better, but it's the best I can manage without an accompanying demonstration.

Just to clarify, I don't mean to make this into a big THING. Everyone can eat their own scones however they choose.

[Formalhaut]

Rather, I meant to convey that it should be of such thickness that one can take a whole bite of it at once. I'm not sure that explanation is any better, but it's the best I can manage without an accompanying demonstration.

I'm still utterly butterly confused. I think a demonstration of your scone eating technique is needed here.

[Pheesh]

I get what you're saying. A scone shouldn't be that thin though was my point, if it's that thin then it's either smaller in diameter than a regular scone or it hasn't risen properly and is going to be very dense.

And I DID mean to make this into a big thing

[Mr. Carnelian]

I think that this is detracting from the central issue, which is the VITALLY important question of "own" vs "gone".

Pick a side, Pheesh!

[Pheesh]

I'm waiting to see if Loony BoB has some really weird argument to make about the whole naming thing before I pick a side.

No doubt he's going to come in here batting for the 'rhymes with clown' side.