Piper is indeed bae. But first,

TREMBLE BEFORE THE MIGHT OF EL PRESIDENTE!



Behold, foolish Wastelanders! Look at our bustling capitalist shopping district! ...shut up I'm lazy.



And fear our mighty defences! (in the gap in the wall there's a pressure plate and if you step on it you get zapped I'm really proud of that one!) Oh and check out dat bootay.



Me, bae and our pet flamingo, Jeff. He's not touched his food in days so I'm a bit worried about him. I'm beginning to wonder if the post apocalypse is the right environment for raising a flamingo.

Yes I have spent the entire smurfing game wearing this god damn hat and no I am not taking it off for anyone.