If you owned/ran a restaurant...

[Pheesh]

The One Eyed Monster. It only serves penises but my oh my, what a veritable cornucopia of animal dong it'd be. You want goat schlong? You got it. Fancy a little slice of walrus wang? Be our guest. In the mood for a nibble of a giraffe's johnson? Relax, we got you covered.

There would be a free meal for anyone who would be willing to take on the Bulging Blue Whale Boner challenge. Eat the whole pee pee in one sitting and the Crown of Ding-a-Ling would be yours.

What do you guys have in the way of sauce options?

[Freya]

This thread got weird.

[Formalhaut]

It would be called You Get What You're Given. There would be a price that might vary day to day and there would be prices for "Food" and "Drink" and the people would get what they are given.

People with severe allergies might complain.

[Crop]

It'd be called Hannibal's, and I'd only serve liver with fava beans and a nice chianti.

[Shiny]

Legit laughing at everything in here.

[NorthernChaosGod]

It would serve steak and anyone that asked for something above medium would be asked to leave.

[Zanmato]

I'd run a vegetarian or a dessert restaurant - I love chocolate!

[Laddy]

Bring Your Friends. Bring your friend and we'll prepare them per your order.

[Pumpkin]

I would do a poutine and beaver tail chip stand or something

[Kalevala]

My problem is that all of my job kitchen experience has been in pubs/bar & grill settings, when those aren't really my favourite kinds of food.

Maybe a vegan take one of those menus? I'm not really sure. I love sushi and Indian cuisine as well.

[TheKeybasHKey]

The KeybasH Kitchen. It serves any kinds of food, whatever your tastes desire.

[Madame Adequate]

I mean, what's really the point in posting here after Paul already posted that post?

[The Summoner of Leviathan]

Holy trout... Thank god some of you don't run restaurants O_O

Maybe you guys would be more comfortable owning, say, a wrestling company. Or being the head of a dictatorship.

Evidentially you haven't been in kitchens, chefs are dictators.

I would burn my restaurant down and dance on the ruins because I will have escaped the industry...

Or just open a small B&B like the Dragonfly Inn from Gilmore Girls and cook local and seasonal ingredients.

[Scotty_ffgamer]

Paddy's Pub.

[Pheesh]

Holy trout... Thank god some of you don't run restaurants O_O

Maybe you guys would be more comfortable owning, say, a wrestling company. Or being the head of a dictatorship.

Evidentially you haven't been in kitchens, chefs are dictators.

Over their staff, sure. They can't go around stuffing shellfish into everyone's mouth or slapping the freshly served food out of their customers mouths though... Much as they may like to.