I got what I expected out of the game: some laughs. However, it turned out much worse than I imagined it would be. I expected it would just be a simplistic, boring game, but it was instead a Frankenstein game that just got worse and worse at the end.

I noticed some reviews sugar-coated some things, so here's my basic list of my impressions:
  • The game is buggy and unoptimized. Slow load times and glitchy, frustrating interactions (like simply trying to press x to check something can be a chore, because you're not standing in the right place or completely still). Still, makes for some amusing times.
  • Your party members are constantly getting themselves killed in battle, because you have no control over them. Dragon Quest IV for the Famicom had a more advanced system than this (if it's the one I'm thinking of in which you have mostly-independent party members for the first time)...
  • Equipment and magic feel completely inconsequential. We blasted through the game willy nilly without much consideration of those things. Maybe we had two game overs?
  • Simple menu and dialogue convenience features are missing (like skipping cutscenes, selling all items or instantly choosing to sell all of one item in a shop). That is unless they patched those things and I didn't notice.
  • Pay attention to optional actions like listening to radio or reading papers scattered on the ground, because that's how the game transmits important plot points to you. It does not show most of them to you. Also, I recommend watching the movie to have a better understanding.
  • There is only one character I felt like I understood and was relatable.
  • The amount of product placement...my God. Most hilarious thing ever.
  • Nothing makes the world feel smaller than the fact that there are like 3 NPC models duplicated EVERYWHERE. It's hilarious. Once, I saw a car with two of the same NPC in it.
  • I think the realism of the game is responsible for how ridiculous it feels at times.
  • It's very derivative of previous installments as well as Kingdom Hearts. There are both good and bad results from this.


Can't really get into issues with the game's weird story logic without spoilers.