Do you not hear yourselves? HAWAIIAN Pizza?Originally Posted by Fynn
That's like... Russian Sushi. Korean Hamburgers. British any food. It's doomed to failure from the start. What happened was, when Francesco Pisa invented the Pizza in 1293, he created the basic shape and cheese covering, but it wasn't until the brothers Enrico and Giancarlo Margaretti added a pureed tomato base in the early 16th century that the Margarita pizza we all know today came into being. This wasn't just the first true pizza, it was the beginning of the pizza culture in Italy, which has dominated global cuisine ever since.
In the centuries since, the greatest chefs of the Italian nation (and, by extension, the world) have experimented with new and exciting pizza recipes. Many of which have now become common household staples. The Farmhouse, the Seafood, the Cajun Chicken Sizzler etc. However in the early 1950s two rogue chefs opened a pizzeria in Naples that attempted something none had dared before: they served ham pizzas... with added pineapple. Pineapple. The people were wary, but Italians are not well known for being snobs, so they graciously gave this new dish a fair chance.
It was a disaster. In 6 months the national suicide rate was up almost 15%, and emergency treatments for choking and malnutrition reached their highest points since World War II. Given the severity of the consequences, and the Italian government's desire to contain the knowledge of what they deemed a "culinary weapon," the developers of the dish were not given a simple prison sentence. Instead, they were exiled to an uninhabited island acquired by the Italians during the war, which they were never forced to relinquish because it lacked any strategic military value. The goal was to create a new prison facility worse than even Guantanemo; an island were the occupants would be served Pineapple pizzas morning, noon, and night. The island was named 'Hawaii,' and thus the pineapple pizza quickly picked up the nickname 'Hawaiian Pizza'. So in most of the civilized world, to have your food compared to a 'Hawaiian Pizza' - a dish made solely for the inhabitants of a prison island as a form of correctional torture - was the most horrendous insult you could receive.
Then in 1959 the USA bought Hawaii from the Italian government because they thought there was a market in New York for pineapple on pizza. Masochists.
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