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			Gabriel Jesus is a king and it is the greatest tragedy that he has to play at Arsenal
		
	 
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			Bruno Fernanj is a shambolic fraud, his being mentioned in the same breath as KDB is a disgrace
		
	 
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			Graham Potter to Chelsea will end in tears for everyone involved
		
	 
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			Erling Haaland is a holy love cyborg from outer space and Mbappe isn't fit to clean his boots
		
	 
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			An option about Spuds because I have to but care so little about them I don't know what to say
		
	 
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			Idiot fans working themselves into a shoot over the 7 year curse will manifest Jurgens sacking...
		
	 
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			...and will refuse to accept blame next year when Stevie G manages Liverpool into 15th in the league
		
	 
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			everton lol