I can't speak for everyone else, but I know when I give a warning or something for a rude comment its because the person on the recieving end of the comment complained about it, and even then I regularly tell them that I'm not their mommy and they should try to deal with it themselves.

And I don't think that staff members telling someone its not okay to be rude is being strict; its not like people are getting banned for it.

Also, for the most part, sending a rude comment someone's way is flaming them, which is indeed against the rules.