I'm a bada*s rockstar from the streets of LA. I come up from nothing wit only da shirt on my back and a guitar I pulled out of Eric Clapton's garbage. that guy. He goes though guitars like nobody's business. One time I was snoopin around his house and he was all "JAHILUH THIS GUITAR HAS A BUG ON IT! HAVE IT REMOVED IMMEDIATLY" and so they threw it out of the window and I was like "Score!" and then I found a cape and I flew to nevernverland and rocked the house and everyone was like "bow bow chicka bow wow boom snaff" and then All the chicks came up and were all "omg sex me plz" and I was like "oh hell yes" and so we went to my hotel room and there was this guy there, see. Only he wasn't a guy. He was a gorilla. And I was like "Yo." You know. Like anyone would do. I was all "Yo gorilla. Whachoo doin' in my pad, b" and the gorilla was all "Dayum, man. I was just eatin' oreo and watin for you, dig it? I got somethin here for you" and he pulls out this briefcase, right? and inside was a peanut. And I was all "Dude. A peanut" and the gorilla was like "Hells yeah" and I ate the peanut. And suddenly my craving to eat a peanut was gone. So I says to the gorilla "You man I gotta pay you back somehow" but by the then the gorilla had mysteriously dissappeared.

And that is the story of how I kicked my smoking habit. The end.
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