what do i do

[blue_midget192]

u may be right about that but....thats what i'l try meet on the park (private spot we'v found on there) and talk to her about it, as yet we haven't talked about it face to face yet, so that seems the best plan of action for now. i was just wondering if anyone could see any other option that we couldn't see that wasn't breaking up.

[Flying Mullet]

Unfotunately there really aren't any more realistic options. Eventually you have to face your problems head on or they'll just tear you up inside.

[Dreamtiger42]

B decides to sit and read about people talking about her over the internet.......... B has a name and doesnt have a drug problem, B is annoyed....... & guilty at the same time

[Zell's Fists of Fury]

Windex?
Walrus tusks?
Women?
Wally World?

I'm lost.

[LH]

A should lay off of B. If B has to stop smoking W, then maybe B should make A stop watching TV or eating at Mc Donald's or whatever makes A happy.

Or maybe A could start smoking C instead.

[Ultimate_Sandwich]

Originally posted by blue_midget192
the other thing is i feel like im in he wrong becasue im stopping her from doing sumthing that she wants to do.

Booyah. You just hit the nail on the head, there, A. Hi. I'm C. I occasionally relax with my friends and some W. It's a surprisingly high percentage of the population that hangs out with W, and a surprisingly low percentage of them are deadbeat drug addicts. Yeah, kills some brain cells. So does alcohol. So does reality TV. I have a few extras to spare anyway. I get good marks in school, I'm responsible, and I'm not *arfing* up my life.

Besides, early in my relationship with D, she wanted me, C, to smoke less or stop. I didn't see much of a reason to, or I just didn't want to. I tried to explain this to her. She didn't like it at first, but then she realized that my decisions are my own to make. And she loves me. And W bears no weight in the face of love.

Besides, she eventually realized something else: It's just weed. It's not crack. It's barely harmful to the individual unless abused frequently. It's a RECREATIONAL drug--and barely a drug compared to the rest of the substances in the same category, which I never touch. And alcohol and tobacco (which are LEGAL and GOVERNMENT TAXED) are much, MUCH worse.

People have a hard time understanding this, simply because "illegal" must always mean "bad": IT'S NOT A BIG DEAL. Get over it.

*Dylan

Do NOT try to avoid the swear filter. --Unne

EDIT: I didn't know there was a swear filter. We're more or less adults here, I thought the infrequent swear word, when used appropriately, could be tolerated. And I DID use a "*". Oh well. *arfing* works just as well.

[Peegee]

If smoking "W" makes B stupid, then A has reason to not want B to smoke "W"....wait why am I doing this crap? If you really don't want her to do it, then give her an ultimatum and stand by it.

[Linus]

Originally posted by Dreamtiger42
B decides to sit and read about people talking about her over the internet.......... B has a name and doesnt have a drug problem, B is annoyed....... & guilty at the same time

<b>SCANDAL!</b>

[Logan]

Q should talk to W about smoking the Y, and if W doesn't stop the Y smoking they need to have a long hard talk about the Y.

If she's lying, that isn't good. If she's addicted, that isn't good. If she's both, that isn't good.

[Ultimate_Sandwich]

Originally posted by Moo Moo the Ner Cow
If you really don't want her to do it, then give her an ultimatum and stand by it.

Ultimatums are what turn girls into bitches. And guys into tyrants. And these definitions are interchangeable. An ultimatum causes restrictions directly because of the relationship. This puts stress on the relationship. Even if it survives, there is irreparable damage. This leads to problems down the road.

I enjoy a stress-free relationship. Why? Because we are both free. Neither of us controls the other. You want to give her an ultimatum? You might as well push her down a hole and forget about her. You will not solve anything.

*Dylan

[Meat Puppet]

My girlfriend threatened me, if I didn't stop. So, I did.
It's easier when you're poor.

[Dreamtiger42]

B Enters conversation again:

Thanx Ultimate_Sandwich for being so understanding, I don't see it as a big deal! I don't even do it that often, I (B) smoke W maybe once a month, TOPS! and he (A) goes pyscho on me (B)!

He (A) did give me an unltimatium and I (B) got annoyed because it was like him (A) saying that I (B) cant do what I (B) want, its either him (A) or having a bit of fun! (W)

So I (B) saw it best not to argue, choose him (A) and have my bit of fun (W) when he (A) didnt know so that it shudnt bother/ upset him (A)

So basically A & B are trying to sort this out without using the words "Ultimatium" "spilt up" or "push down a hole!"

Anyone (U) got a good suggestion?

[Flying Mullet]

Well if you both mean a lot to each other then a compromise has to be reached or one of you is going to have to bow to the other's demands. Obvisouly you each have very strong opinions about this. You have to talk this out and see it from the other person's standpoint and be willing to compromise. Relationships are all about compromise. If you go in thinking that you will be the exact same person and do the exact same things that you do on your own you are in for a suprise.

And B, you went behind his back to do it. If it's not a big deal then you wouldn't have to sneak around like this. Obviously it is a big deal to him, and if you care you'll work it out or at least see why he doesn't like it.

[Dr Unne]

There is no such thing as compromise when it comes to values. There is no advice anyone can give except live by your values. If you know what you believe, the choice is already made for you. If your values include using drugs, then I guess you'll use them. If your values include having girlfriends who use drugs, then I guess you're a good match for a drug user. Similarly, liars and people who tolerate liars go well together, whereas liars and people who don't tolerate liars don't. If your values include a willingness to betray your own values for the sake of maintaining a relationship, well I guess you'll do well with anyone.

[Dreamtiger42]

The only reason I lied is because I was backed into a corner!

I mean I cant just say "whats the big deal?! I love u, and i want to have a smoke now and again deal with it!"
it was a "me or w" and I was annoyed i had to make such a crappy descicion