what do i do
right heres the watered down situation, A wants B to stop smoking a certain drug begining with "W". B will not (as far as i know) stop and one time that B sed B was going to B went behind A's back to do it. A will not let B smoke this drug and has confiscated some of the aformentioned drug. A and B are going out and dont want to end the relationship but dont know wat to do?
Originally Posted by My Mate Nats
Well if it's that important that you, I mean "A", really want "B" to stop smoking, then A will need to make an ultimatum. Eventually you will have to decide between B and your beliefs if B won't stop smoking.
If my significant other lied to my face about anything, I'd dump her and find someone who isn't a liar. If my significant other liked drugs more than she liked me, I'd dump her and find someone who isn't a moron.
just break up. it's not like you are going to get married.
Moral of the story kids: <i>Dr. Unne doesn't date morons.</i>
Plus, even if you did, they couldn't have kids from smoking all of the W, so what's the point?Originally posted by eestlinc
just break up. it's not like you are going to get married.
so ur best solution is to just flat break up with her? that is the final bacl up ooption that i dont want to do.
Well she lied to you, "cheated" on you (with W) and isn't willing to change. It's a tough situation but is it a good one and is it worth it?
the way she makes me feel (very good) is a good eno8ugh reason i think thats why im actually asking not just dumping her. she dint actually go through with the behind my back bit, she was going to but i caught her, well she sent a text the my fone that wont for me, but i see what u mean, but htats not wat i wanna do.
Well just because you caught her before she did it doesn't make it any better. That's like walking in on her with another guy as they are getting naked and are going to get busy, but because you caught her before the dirty deed, it's not a bad thing.
hey sex with someone else is different to smoking W. behind my back. i know it dont make it any better, but i..we need a realistic conclusion that doesn't include breakng up.
why isn't breaking up realistic? Obviously you don't mean much to her if she smokes weed behind your back after you asked her not to. If you mean a lot to her then she would have not smoked or told you that smoking it means a lot to her and discussed why. By going behind your back it says that she told you what you wanted to hear to avoid the problem because she doesn't care if she hurts your feelings or not.
thats unfair, we have talked about this and the reason she did it was she saw it as a less painful option on my part becasue i dint know, i konw this isn't exactly the best thing to do but i se where she's comming from. breackin up aint realistic becasue i dont want to break up with her because she means a lot to me. the other thing is i feel like im in he wrong becasue im stopping her from doing sumthing that she wants to do.
If breaking up is completely out of the question, you have to live with her and her drug habits. You can't change people if they don't want to change. You either love someone for who they are or you don't. If you love someone not for who they are but for who they potentially can be, you're in love with someone that doesn't exist except in your own mind. It's your choice whether you feel like being with someone who lies to you and acts like an idiot. Think with your mind, not with your feelings.
B + W = Bad.
A + B + W = Bad.
A - (B + W) = Good.
You need to sit down and have a real good heart-to-heart chat with her then. Obviously this is an important issue to both of you, and it's not going to go anywhere, so you need to discuss it now or you're going to keep getting hurt, no matter her reasons or intentions for why she's doing what she does. Sadly, it might come to you choosing her drug habit or breaking up, as Dr. Unne said. And I know that this next statement is well-used, but there are other fish in the sea. You will meet another girl that you will like just as much, if not better, than your present girl.
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