ARGH NO THE HOUSE I'M MOVING INTO IS DEVOID OF A MICROWAVE DEVICE HOWEVER WILL I COPE?!
Grown-ups do not need a machine that goes "PING!"
Pop your popcorn in the toaster, dummy!
Nag Superman everytime you want stuff warmed up so he'll glare at you and then you can hold up the food instead and he'll x-ray it and then it'll get really hot and you'll drop it and it'll smash lots.
And so The Spider People begin their revenge.
Oh no I'm fourteen!
ARGH NO THE HOUSE I'M MOVING INTO IS DEVOID OF A MICROWAVE DEVICE HOWEVER WILL I COPE?!
Microwaves are the devil. I'm anti-microwave.
Sure, they save power. And they're quick. And you can easily re-heat frozen food.
But what they do to food is terrible. (in most circumstances, microwaved popcorn is fine) Like pies. Pies should be oven cooked. And what's with those microwave dinners. Someone evil is trying to make us a packaged society. Learn how to cook! I did.
Microwaves also make me sick. One time I microwaved a mince pie which was previously PACKAGED and when I got it out after a mere 1minutesometrout it was a watery slude with tough meat and some seeping jelly meat.
If I'm ever insane enough to buy packaged pie I now know to use the oven.
AND they talk to me at night. Tell me all kinds of whacko commands that I'd probably never follow unless I was stoned enough.
Oh, and just in case all my points are invalid, pressing your head to the microwave while it's cooking causes prostate cancer where oven just burn yer skin off!
I wish I was cool enough to say that
Here's an experiment:
melt spreadable butter in the microwave until it is liquid
let it set
sprinkle it with 100's&1000's
eat
Last edited by Meat Puppet; 04-03-2004 at 12:27 PM.
You will probably melt it to the floor.
You didn't move to Sunnyvale did you?
The Spider-People are obviously behind this.
It's the only logical explanation (and the only thing in the poll that makes any sense).
"As the days go by, we face the increasing inevitability that we are alone in a godless,
uninhabited, hostile and meaningless universe. Still, you've got to laugh, haven't you?"
I voted For Superman, 'cause Superman is teh roxxor
Microwaves do thier job by bombarding food with microwave radiation, which in essence vaporises water (among other nasty molecular reactions with various metals), so it doesn't actually cook anything, it just kinda boils it. You can see this easily if you huck a stale piece of bread in there for 20 seconds or so -> It goes in dry to the touch and comes out moist and warm after the reaction sucks all the humidity that's left right out of it. The edges are far warmer than the center due to the fact that the microwaves are hitting it from the outside inwards.
How, then, can you stop your food from liquifing? When heating already moist foods spread it out to the edges of your dish leaving a hole in the center and cook in short bursts, stir and spread in between 45-60 second intervals.
/*ends lame microwave cooking lesson*
My family survived without a microwave for over a decade. You eveuntually get used to it. You could buy one-they're pretty cheap now these days.
I don't own a microwave, I don't need one.
('-'*)/ - "sup"
I like microwaves, they are good for thawing things. And melting hotchocolate for icecream
Signature image too wide.
At Central Penn college this fall!
If there was a God, the microwave would be a gift from it.
Funny you saying that, how microwaves send out BOILING HOT BEAMS OF EVIL DEATH.Originally posted by Nait
If there was a God, the microwave would be a gift from it.
I rest my case.
The Sun sends out BOILING HOT BEAMS OF EVIL DEATH, but who cares, eh?
toaster oven is your friend
How did the monkey people survive?
Yes, but the sun is millions of miles away, and the people who get skin cancer still care.Originally posted by Nait
The Sun sends out BOILING HOT BEAMS OF EVIL DEATH, but who cares, eh?
Having a microwave is like having the sun in your house, it'll kill you, KILL YOU DEAD.
Not that we'll care, good point.
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