yeah have to agree on the A song of fire and Ice series it's brilliant if you want realistic characters and sex heck just read a jaime or a Cersei chapter for around twenty mentions of sex or in a game of thrones any of the danaerys chapters. still mostly it's focused on the political side of war but for action I suggest the Jon chapters set on the wall or the Danaerys chapters.

Other than that I say that the View from the looking glass by Ian Irvine is good and theres a second series I havent read yet on that.