All the good ideas have gone, soooooo:

I would make them poison coffee which I would give to GDW. Bush as I took them past his living room, then I'd take them blowing and show them the owner, then I'd get them to rob a convinance store while high on drugs, then I'd take them to meet my parents, pertend their holding us hostage, call the police and let the senitator of California deal with them