ShlupQuack = stir-fried Hello Kitty flavour.

No, wait.

The Captain would be a lemonade popsicle - a classic, reliable and pleasant, straight-up with no hidden twists.

Leeza reminds me of those ice-cream popsicles covered in frozen fruit juice, don't know what they're called in your country, but here they're marketed as "Fruitopia" amongst other things...

Yamaneko is a chocolate-dipped, raspberry-filled popsicle.
Wholesome and enjoyable on the outside, but RED on the inside.

Del Murder would be moonshine rotgut flavour, with a hint of arsenic.

HOOTERS = alcopop. 'Nuff said.