I wish to inform you of my most recent confirmed discovery titled "The Diffusion of Intelligence".
Most of you are aware of the mind-numbing impact of stupid people, but all major efforts to define this phenomenon have so far been unsuccessful. The observations are easy to note: people possessing a higher concentration of intelligence seem to lose it when interacting with people possessing very low concentrations of intelligence. Examples include loss of higher thought, loss of vocabulary, and loss of constructing coherent sentences.
However, the key question up until now has been "Where does this intelligence go?", for another observation has been that low concentrations of intelligence do not increase over time. Some have suggested that intelligence is not conserved, while others dispute that if that were true, then learning would be an impossibility, as it is essentially the transfer of intelligence from one source to another.
I have found that intelligence is indeed not conserved, and the objection is a flaw, since intelligence is not what is transferred in learning, it is knowledge. By distinguishing between the two, the theory of non-conservation of intelligence is upheld.
Still the phenomenon has not been explained. In order to understand this, we turn to the world of deep space, where black holes reside. Many are aware of the strange phenomenon that black holes are so dense, light cannot even escape their gravitational field. The symbolism to the situation I just studied is so remarkable, it has to be true. One objection arises: Dumb people cannot be dense with knowledge or intelligence, as they have been observed to possess very low concentrations of these items. The objection is dismissed by approaching the situation from a different angle: dumb people are lacking in intelligence, but very dense in idiocy. Much like the matter-dense black hole devours the non-matter light, so does the dense idiot devour the intelligence of the enlightened.
Since we all know this theory is true, don't bother contesting it; just tell of how this discovery has affected you in your day-to-day lives. Have you hugged your idiot today?