The United Kingdom of Elennanórë

[Shlup]

Nation: Elennanórë
Region: 14
Government: Monarchy
Leader: Queen Raine (Rainecloud) and King Quag (ShlupQuack)
Capital: Fellaëton
Religion: The official religion is Nuism, a polythiestic religion that values nature and being natural in one's lifestyle. Most other religions are tolerated.
Entrance: Some areas of the nation are segregated by class and sometimes by race, but anyone who doesn't obviously carry a soiled reputation will be escorted into the gates and to a registration center by one of the local guards.
Exit: Before leaving the gates of any established city, a person must fill out a writ of absence at the gate. Merchants may aquire permits to avoid this.

Laws: All criminals are innocent until deemed guilty by the King or Queen. Crimes are subject to punishment equal to the nature of the crime (ie, murder = death, theft = loss of hand, etc...)

Public nudity is not illegal, but public indecent activity is punishable by naked time in the stocks.

Sodomy is illegal between members of the opposite sex, and a sodomy conviction is punishable by corn cobbing.

It is illegal to consume chocolate on the fourth day of the week, in honor of the King.

There is a 9% sales tax on all non-consumable goods, a 6% sales tax on luxury consumable goods, an 11% sales tax on leather. Livestock is an acceptable form of payment.

Appointed persons shall visit each house once a year, appraise it's worth, and collect a 7% tax.

[Nait]

Ach! It's a conservative libertarian reactionary dream! RUN AWAY!

[Shlup]

Ah... *basks in the glory*

[Nait]

It's going to collapse any minute now!

[Heath]

It's going to collapse any minute now!

Ah good, now if there was only some way I could gain control on that kingdom on the complete opposite side of the world from mine...

[Shlup]

It can't collapse. There's no one to collapse it.

[Nait]

I was bored, so I pronounced the name for you.

What I remember of Quenya is that it follows the length rules of Finnish... Long n and long o in Elennanórë, and that the stress is on the penultimate syllable (not on the first, as in Finnish).


EDIT:

And for fun and profit, I'm going to count the ways this nation is so wrong.


The segregation.

The cruel punishment.

Ban on gays.

The sale-tax! Argh! No income taxes, and a flat tax rate on property! Isn't Rainecloud British? Doesn't he KNOW Tatcher is the bad guy?

[Shlup]

Ban on gays.

Sodomy is illegal between members of the opposite sex

[-N-]

What? No anal?

[Shlup]

Anal is only legal between homosexual couples/groups/whatever. I'm so sick of every heterosexual porn having anal sex, and the chicks acting like it's even better than vaginal sex. It ANGERS me! And so I have made my declairation.

And segregation isn't regulated or an official thing or anything; it's just the way things are in some areas, and often in reality.

And the punishment isn't cruel. It's awesome.

I hate income tax. Don't mind sales tax. Nothing wrong with flat taxes. One of my friends recently got a raise but, oops, now he's in a higher tax bracket so he actually brings home less money! Screw that noise.

[Nait]

Ooops. xo


Anyhow.

Flat taxes are inherently unfair, because when you are poor, most of your money goes to survival - sales taxes and stuff affect that, so that rich people pay too little. The rich are also those who benefit MOST from a nation'ss protection - therefore they should support it more. A person may live in an anarchy, but a multinational corporation with no protection from a nation has difficulties with its assets, cause everyone's looting away.

Tax brackets are kinky, but you could implement a progressive system where the amount of taxes is a function, a mathematical formula, rather than a step-by-step classification system.

[Shlup]

Or I could not spend hours devising a system to make a fake tax system fair for fake people and their fake monies, and go back do doing more productive things like working on my website and peeing in the toilet.

[Nait]

Wadda bore. :O

[Shlup]

Our main exports are livestock and fine wines. I decided that just now.

[-N-]

And segregation isn't regulated or an official thing or anything; it's just the way things are in some areas, and often in reality.

One of my friends recently got a raise but, oops, now he's in a higher tax bracket so he actually brings home less money! Screw that noise.

That's de facto segregation then. Makes sense.

And I believe the appropriate expression is "Eff that noise."